


New Home

by hello33willoTheWisp845



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Back Then, F/F, Friendship and Love, Hatred and hope, Living with the Borg, Loneliness, today
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-13
Updated: 2019-10-03
Packaged: 2020-10-17 22:35:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 29,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20628647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hello33willoTheWisp845/pseuds/hello33willoTheWisp845
Summary: This is a sequel to my short story "Nika". In my short story "Nika" there was a transport accident, whereby Seven was rejuvenated by 20 years and is now a 7 year old child. Because the doctor considers it too dangerous to reverse the transport accident, Seven remains 7 years old and Captain Janeway accepts her as her daughter. But after a few months, the Borg come and kidnap Seven, who is now called Nika (an abbreviation of her real name Annika). Captain Janeway tries to rescue  and bring Nika her back to Voyager, but she can not. Captain Janeway withdraws from her crew. Over the years (16 years) that Voyager needs to get back to the Alpha Quadrant, Captain Janeway is losing her mind more and more through her self-imposed isolation and because she has never gotten over it, that the Borg forcefully snatched her from Nika and they could not save Nika. After Voyager returned in the Alpha Quadrant, Captain Janeway was sent to a mental hospital where she spent the last 10 years.Now as an adult woman Nika returns and wants to take revenge on Janeway. But can Kathryn convince Nika that she is not the enemy, but her friend and never wanted to hurt her? This is where my sequel begins.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my mother tongue, so it may be that some of me was wrong or incorrectly written. I hope you can still follow my story and enjoy reading.
> 
> I had posted my story a few weeks ago so please do not be surprised. I deleted them then because I was a bit frustrated with the story. But now I think she is better and you like she more.

*So that was the woman who was responsible for everything.*

Nika was watching her closely. The woman was fixed to her bed, mumbling confused things in her sleep.

*Strange* since Nika could think, her mother had told about this woman. But this woman here was not what she expected to find when she set out with her Borg fleet to find and kill her.

This woman in front of her was pathetic. She had been looking for a woman who would do anything to get her crew and spacecraft home from the Delta Quadrant to the Alpha Quadrant. Even if that meant selling an innocent child, the Borg, for a faster journey home. Mother had told her everything. And in all those years, Nika had never doubted to find this woman and make her pay for her guilt.

But now that she was standing by the bed, at the fixed woman, she began to doubt that she had found the right woman.

But the medical records and the data Nika collected indicated that this woman was Kathryn Janeway, the captain of the USS Voyager, who disappeared in the Delta Quadrant in 2371.

Nika quickly released the fixation harnesses and mentally instructed her drone to lift Kathryn Janeway out of bed. As soon as the drone had done so, Nika tapped her fingers on a button of her arm, beamed her, Kathryn Janeway, and her two Borg drones back to her Borg scout ship, which stood on the lawn in front of the medical facility.

Once she was back in her Borg Scout ship, Nika breathed in relief. So far no one, not even Starfleet and the Earth Security Force, had noticed that they were on Earth. So she quickly mentally instructed her drones to bring the scout ship back to orbit to reunite with the Borg fleet hiding in a fog near the moon.

A hundred and twenty Borgkubs and Borgspheres were waiting for Nika and her scout ship. Once the scout ship docked in Nikas Borgsphere, she ordered her Borg fleet to head for the Gamma Quadrant.

Kathryn Janeway, was housed in a quickly prepared Borgkammer. And as in the hospital, fixed to the bed and sedated with a sedative. Surely it was safe.


	2. Chapter 2

Past - 1st day at the Borg

Nika's eyes fluttered open and she looked around uncertainly. Startled, she jumped and crawled to the far corner of the bed she'd been lying on when she saw the two ugly men standing in front of her.

"We are the Borg, resistance is futile. Follow us." Both men said in a strange voice at the same time.

Nika's body started to tremble with fear and she tried even more to hide in the corner. But the two men approached her and pulled her out of the corner.

"No, let me go!" Nika screamed and kicked wildly with her legs. But the two men did not mind that. Determined, they walked with Nika, the long greenish corridors down. On the way, Nika saw even more of the men, who also looked strange.

After the two men had brought Nika into a large room, with many technical things, they let her down, but held her tightly by her shoulders.

A few seconds later, a platform descended from the ceiling in front of them. In the middle, Nika could see a woman's head with neck and shoulders, below where the torso was supposed to be, but only saw something that looked like a snake snaking into that area.

Nika swallowed a few times and tried to wriggle out of the grips of the two men. The men were too strong and she too weak.

Next, two hatches opened in the floor and the rest of the body came out. The arms joined with the upper body, then the legs were connected with the body and finally the woman's head, with the neck and the shoulders and the snake Ding, was put on the body.

After everything had connected and the two tubes were released from the body, the woman's eyes fluttered open and she looked emotionless at Nika.

Nika wanted to run away and hide from her, but the men were still holding her. The woman walked over to her and put her black hand on her cheek and stroked it. Terrified, Nika began to tremble again and tears rolled down her cheek.

"We are the Borg and I am the Borg queen. From now on, you are one of us. Nika are not afraid, you are finally back home." Explained the Borg queen and looked at Nika exactly.

"Your cortical knot has been renewed so that you no longer have any memories of your life that you had before. Your past life is unimportant and irrelevant. You are now Borg and as Borg you will adapt. Start your regeneration cycle now." Ordered the Borg queen and the two men brought Nika, desperately trying to break free of them and start screaming, into a niche. There they put Nika in and as soon as she was properly positioned, her small body relaxed and her eyes closed.

************Unimatrix Zero************

When Nika opened her eyes again, she was blinded by the sun's rays. Quickly she took her arm and put her hand over her eyes to see better.

She stood in the middle of a clearing and around her were other people. Astonished, Nika looked around and watched the people talking to each other.

"Hello, you're new here right? I'm Cora, who are you?" A black-haired girl asked Nika suddenly.

"Nika" she said timidly and looked closely at the other girl.

"Hello Nika, do you want to come and play with me?"

Nika shook her head and Cora went back to the other children in distress and kept playing with them. Nika sat down in the grass and watched from wide shy.

**********Borg cubes************

After only a few hours, Nika woke up from her recovery cycle and found herself facing the strange-looking men again. Confused, she looked around and did not know why she was here again. Immediately she began to cry again, but the men took her and took her to a room. There she was left alone and Nika hiddet herself into a corner.

Present

Kathryn's eyes fluttered open, her eyes wandering restlessly through the room where she had now woken up. When she realized that she was no longer in her hospital room, that she had lived so many years, she panicked and began screaming wildly and defending herself against the fixations. Desperately, she tried to free herself, but the years, almost permanent ones lying in her bed, had weakened her muscles and her physical condition.

******************************

The drone, which had been positioned in front of the Borg chamber, immediately informed Nika, who came quickly hurried. She nodded to the drone so he took a few steps away.

Nika stood for a long moment in front of the Borg Chamber listening to the desperate screams from Janeway. The screams sounded raw and wild, reminding Nika of an injured animal trapped and fighting for its survival. With each passing minute she stood in front of the Borg Chamber listening to these screams, she could hear Janeway expended more and more and her cries sounding more and more quiet and exhausted.

Before Nika could decide to enter the Borg Chamber, the screams suddenly stopped.

*Good* Nika thought and turned to Borgdrone, mentally instructing her to resume her previous position and continue to guard the prisoner. Then she returned to her own Borg chamber.

******************************

In her Borg chamber she was already expected by Amira, her servant.

"She screamed like a pig. Do you remember when we met? My Borgsphere was stranded on your planet and we had to wait for our rescue from another Borgsphere or a Borg cube. At that time the drones caught a pig to quench their hunger. And before they cut his throat, it screamed just as she did." Nika narrated in disgust as she pressed a button on her black-gray exoskeleton and it immediately shut down.

Half naked, wearing only a panty, Nika stood in her borg chamber and looked at Amira in disgust.

"Just killing her would be too good a death for her." Nika sighed deeply, allowing Amira to give her a robe that she immediately put on.

"May I ask what you intend to do with her? Why did you stray from your plan to find her and kill her immediately?" Amira asked shyly.

Nika looked at her seriously. "Killing her in her sleep would have been too easy. I want her to meet my eyes when I put my hands around her neck and let her take her breath away. I want her to know who is killing her and why that happens. And I want her to whine about her wretched life, only to realize that it does not help. I want to crush her like a little prylan beetle. You know how nice they squeak, right?" Nika asked Amira, who looked at Nika in disgust.

"So we'll take her with us?" Amira asked after a moment of silence.

"Yes, once. In the hospital all these years she was pumped with so many medicines to keep her quiet that she is now completely beside herself and can not think clearly. It will take a while for her body to be completely cleansed of the poison. I want her to be clear minded when I face her and then confront her with her guilt." Nika explained as she sat down at her bedside table and brush her long blond hair.


	3. Chapter 3

**Past - 2nd day at the Borg**

Nika was rudely roused from sleep by a Borg drone. At some point she was in the corner fell asleep, exhausted by many crying.

Nika tried to fight how back the day before and kicked wildly with her legs, waving her arms to keep the Borg drone away. But her efforts were in vain. The Borg drone was unimpressed and much stronger than her.

Once again, she was taken to the Borg Queen in the great room, which this time was already fully assembled, waiting for her and looking closely at her.

"We will have to make some improvements to you." Said the Borg Queen and took a small device from a Borg drone and wanted to attach it to Nika. But Nika ducked and turned away. This time she was faster than the Borg drone that had stood behind her. Nika quickly ran out of the big room and turned into the hallway to her left. However, when she looked back, she collided with another drone, which she immediately held and brought back to the room to the Borg queen.

"Resistance is futile. Comply!" Came the voice of the Borg King sternly, as Nika stood again in front of her and began to cry again.

"Why am I here?" She asked in a shaky desperate voice.

"You are Borg." The Borg queen explained, but Nika looked at her irritated.

"Why am I Borg?" Nika asked, and the Borg queen realized that she had to explain it to Nika.

"Two years ago, you were a normal Borg drone, like all the other Borg drones here in the collective. You were Seven of Nine, tertiary attribute of Unimatrix 01. But then came Captain Kathryn Janeway. She took advantage of our helplessness against Species 8472 and offered us a way out of annihilation, through this species. We accepted your offer and sent you as a mediator to them. Janeway then stole you from us, she has dissected you, removed your Borg implants and made you look like her face. She gave you hair and a clothes, she poisoned your thoughts with individual desires and needs. She has forced you to help her and used your Borg knowledge. And if that was not enough, she admitted you to become a child again by a transport accident. And because she did not need you as a child, she made another offer to us. She sold you to us to get two transwarp coils to get back to her home quadrant faster. You are Borg and you are one of us. Therefore, we have again adopted Janeway's offer. That's why you're back with us, your collective." said the Borg queen.

Nika looked at the Borg queen with wide eyes.

"I was just like they?" She asked astonished, pointing to a Borg drone.

"Yes, you were. But now you're a kid, and I've erased from your memory the memory of the last two years you've been to Janeway so you can start over, with no poisoned thoughts and irrelevant needs and wishes."

"Why did Janeway do that to me?" Nika asked shyly.

"Because she is egoistic and selfish."

"What's egoistic?" Nika asked confused, her head was buzzing with so much information and she knew so little to do with it.

"Being egoistic means only following one's own interests, regardless of whether other people are harmed. Comply and you will understand everything better." Said the Borg Queen and held up the small device visible in her hand.

"What's that?" Nika asked anxiously.

"This is a neural processing accessory, it improves your synaptic efficiency and connects you to the Hive consciousness. Comply." Said the Borg Queen and approached Nika.

Nika looked at her anxiously, but did not try to fight back. Therefore, the Borg Queen held the small device to Nikas neck and immediately it connected with many small tubes with her and penetrated into her skin. A sharp pain spread in Nikas body, but stopped right after.

As soon as the neural processing additive was integrated into Nikas neural nervous system, she was associated with the Hive consciousness. Many voices suddenly began to hum and mumble in Nika's head. It chilled Nika on the back.

Mentally, the Borg queen immediately sent her the data Nika should know about Seven of Nine. Within seconds, Nika could see everything the Borg queen mentally told her. She stood there staring at everything. In the end she saw how she was kidnaped away by the Borg, then the pictures stopped.

"You will remain an individual, you are special to us and therefore we will only rebuild you with the most important and necessary implants instead of assimilating you again. You will have to relearn everything you have lost in knowledge. The emotions of humanity, such as fear, anger and vanity, you will discard, that only spoils your mind. You are destined to take over the Borg collective after my demise. We will prepare you for it. From now on I am your mother and you will comply, resistance is useless." Said the Borg queen.

Nika looked uncertainly at the Borg queen and blinked her eyes.

"This Borg drone will now lead you to a data portal, where you will familiarize yourself with the history of the Borg and the Borg itself." Explained the Borg queen and turned away from Nika and left her alone with the Borg drone.

Then the Borg drone led Nika through some corridors of the Borg cube and stopped in front of a console. The drone showed Nika how she had to insert her assimilation tubes into the data portal in order to read the data. Nika's assimilation tubes immediately connected to the data nodes and immediately assimilated all the knowledge of the Borg and its history. Nika stood for hours at the console and had to analyze and process all the data.

**Present**

Silently and nervously Amira stood in front of the borg chamber of Kathryn Janeway and hesitated to enter. Hours ago, she started crying desperately and Nika had asked her to take care of her.

At first she did not like it, but then Nika had made it an order and she had to follow.

Sighing deeply, Amira entered the Borg chamber, but stopped at the door and studied Janeway closely. She was not sure why she had to take care of her when there were enough drones to handle it. But Nika had been relentless in her command. Which was strange, since Nika was never someone who forced others to do something. At least not like that.

As soon as Janeway realized that she was no longer alone in the Borg chamber, she had thrown herself against the fixations and tried to free herself. She shouted even louder and more desperately than in the last hours.

Nika had been right, the woman was screaming and it was as if a wounded animal were trying to free herself. It was embarrassing to have to watch this.

Her head whirled wildly, her hair swatted against her head, her legs uncoordinated, kicking the covers off her body as her hands and arms twisted, trying to escape fixation. Her skin was chafed at various points around the wrist and bleeding.

Amira sighed deeply before slowly moving to the bed to take a closer look at the extent of the injuries. As soon as she was close enough to the bed Janeway could see, she stopped bracing herself against the fixations. Instead, she looked at Amira with an irritated and confused look. She had stopped the screams.

"Where ... where ... am ... me?" She stuttered in a hoarse tortured voice. But Amira had strict orders not to speak to her, so she ignored the question and instead took the now limp on the bed and turned her wrist to look at the injuries.

"Who are you ??????????" Janeway cried desperately "Where am I ?????????"

"Shht, I'm not allowed to answer your questions, so you better be calm and let me do my job." Hissed Amira contemptuously. "Or should I also close your mouth?" She asked afterwards.

Janewy immediately became silent and Amira was able to take care of the injuries.

"Are you thirsty and hungry?" Amira asked after she finished.

"Yes." Came the husky answer from Janeway.

"Well, I'll go get something for you, but only if you stop screaming like that. Screaming brings nothing here, but makes my mistress even more angry. And you do not want to see what happens when my mistress is angry. So be quiet. Understood?" Amira warned her and Janeway nodded her head.

"Good" with that Amira turned around and left the Borg chamber.

Outside, Nika was leaning against the bulkhead, already waiting for Amira.

"Your mistress?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes, my mistress." Amira replied and winked at Nika before she went to the next replicator.

"After all, you ordered me to take care of her. And her constant shouting is so pathetic that I could not bear it anymore. Somehow I had to turn it off, right?"

"Yes you are right. What does she make an impression on you?" Nika asked curiously.

Amira looked at Nika in surprise. "Why do you want to know that?"

"I have to know how clear she is in the head. I already explained to you why I want that." Nika replied and looked at Amira seriously.

"She seems completely out of control. It is not very clear in my mind, in my opinion. It was not for nothing that she was after the hospital records, as long as in the medical facility. Did you read the files carefully?"

"Yes, but everything in there is a big lie. It states that she lost her mind when her daughter was kidnapped by the Borg. And her daughter's name is Nika. Should I believe that this woman is my mother and not to blame for growing up with the Borg?" Nika asked angrily.

"No, of course you should not believe that, but it's strange, your mother has been telling you since you thought Kathryn Janeway sold you to the Borg and is in the medical records that Janeway went crazy because the Borg have you kidnapped her." said Amira.

Nika glared at Amira. "She's to blame for everything and she'll pay for it." She said in a hateful voice, turned around and left Amira.

Amira sighed and turned to the replicator and ordered a lunch menu, which she then brought to Janeway.


	4. Chapter 4

**Past - 2 months with the Borg**

In the last few weeks, Nika had learned a lot about the Borg and its history. Now, for two days, she was introduced to the specific construction of a Borg cube and learned what was all-present on a Borg cube. The current topic was the Borg maturation chamber. When Nika found out there were assimilated children, she became curious.

Since she was here on the Borg cube, she felt more and more lonely and alone. Most of the time, she was on her own.

Fortunately, the Borg queen had not seen her for a while. Nika found this woman, who, as she had learned, consisted of two parts: the organic part (consisting of the head, shoulders and backbone, provided with numerous cybernetic implants) and the technical part (which included the torso, arms and legs), creepy.  
She could not talk to the Borg drones. Nika had already tried to talk to them, but they remained silent and ignored her. The individual drones always took them to the data console, to their Borg chamber, or to their alcoves. They brought their food and drink. But they did not do more.

When she regenerated, she found herself in a place where there were children, but Nika was too shy and too scared because she did not know where she was and who the other kids were, to play with them.

*But this was the right world* Nika thought through it. *And if there were children here on the Borg cube, then she had to find them.*

Therefore, after completing her studies, Nika went through the Borg cube and searched the Borg maturation chamber.

She had been looking for them for a while and over and over again, her way through Borg drone was blocked because she came into areas where she was not to stay.

*********************

Only after a few days in which she had searched intensively, she finally found the Borg maturation chamber. But there were no children waiting for her to play with, as she had expected. No, here were the children in the different sized maturation chambers in a greenish liquid, trapped. On her bodies Nika could recognize differently shape implants. There was even a baby in a small maturation chamber.

Nika looked at the children in horror and tears ran down her cheek.

"So here she would not find children to play with." Nika thought defeated, sat down on the floor and gave herself her grief.

In the weeks and months that followed, she often visited the Borg maturation chamber and looked how the children were. She had even started to give them names. And as soon as one of the children had grown up and left the maturation chamber, Nika followed the new drone to her workplace.

Kenny was the first to leave his maturation chamber as a full-blown drone. It happened only a few months after Nika found the maturation chamber. On, she followed him every step of the way. She felt close to him and told him everything she had experienced, moved and what she had discovered. Of course he never answered her and did his duty, but Nika pretended he answer her.

After Nika followed Kenny every day for about five months, her mother got, what she did. Nika was then brought to her and had to watch as Mother mentally ordered some drones to disable Kenny and he was disassembled by her in pieces.

Throughout the procedure, tears ran freely over Nikas cheeks and her body trembled with rage, guilt and sadness.

"Your human emotions are unwanted, they poison your mind. Let go of it and you will feel better. Comply." Explained her mother and looked hard at Nika.

Nika wiped her tears with her sleeves and nodded dejectedly to her mother. Then she was taken to her Borg chamber and should not leave her for several days.

After that, Nika did not visit more the Borg maturation chamber and she did not follow the washed-out drones. She stayed away from them from then on. But mentally she tried to find her in Hive consciousness and to get in touch with them. But in Hive consciousness, there were billions of voices swelling to a single voice, so Nika never managed to reach the children from the maturation chamber.

Even in her secret world, Nika tried to find the children again, but again they were not. Therefore, she made friends slowly with the other children there.

**Present**

While Amira took care of Janeway, Nika got into her alcove and started her regeneration cycle. Once logged in, she found herself in Unimatrix Zero, the secret world where all the drones that had a recessive mutation met and could be individuals again for a few hours.

Here too, came the idea of assembling all the drones and founding a new collective, far from the original collective. But as soon as the drones completed their regeneration cycle, they also lost the knowledge of their secret life in Unimatrix Zero and everything that had been discussed there. Therefore, it took years before their plan could be implemented.

Only Nika retained her knowledge of Unimatrix Zero after her regeneration. But she was unaware that this knowledge was important to all other drones who could visit the Unimatrix Zero.

In Unimatrix Zero, everything was different than in her real life at the Borg. Life here pleased Nika much better. Here she could be who she wanted to be, do whatever she wanted and she felt part of the community.

Secretly, Nika had often wished to be like all the other drones in real life. The drones were neither unhappy nor capable of feeling emotions. The only thing they did was take orders, do their work and tasks, and when that was done, turn to other tasks. Each drone had a specific task and all the drones together formed a huge whole. All were united to a single mind, with a single goal – perfection.

But Nika was alone, she did not really belong to them. She was neither a complete Borg drone nor a complete individual. She was incomplete, weak, alone and lonely.

Only when she was in Unimatrix Zero did she feel part of a community. Here she found when she was little, children at their age, with whom they could play, laugh and explore their surroundings. Here she was happy and free. She wanted to stay there forever. But once her regeneration cycle was over, she was back in the Borg cube, exposed to her mother, feeling like a never-ending nightmare.

*********************

"Nika, how are you?" Asked Cora, who saw Nika sitting on a tree stump. Nika looked at her friend and smiled dejectedly. "Bad" she replied and Cora frowned at her.

"Why, what's going on? Is something going wrong with our plan?" She asked worriedly.

"No, we are on a direct path to the planets planned for us. That's not it." Nika answered softly.

"What is it then?"

Nika sighed deeply and looked at Cora in agony.

"I have Kathryn Janeway, the woman responsible for grown me up with the Borg, to take her to my Borg ship. Mother told me a long time, Janeway has sold me on it for two Transwarp coils so she could go back to the Alpha Quadrant with their spaceship faster and I learned Kathryn Janeway to hate more than anything else in the galaxy. But now that she is here with me and I have read the medical records of her and there everything is described very differently, then the question arises to me, what really happened then. I do not remember my life, which I lived before I came to the Borg. So I have two stories, one is a big lie and the other is the truth. But mother is the Borg queen. Borg do not lie. That's impossible. So who or what should I believe?" Nika asked uncertainly.

Cora sat down to Nika. "That's a very difficult question. I'm here just as long as you are. I have not lived in the real world as an individual as you, to know what's true or untrue. I'm so sorry. I do not know what to advise you." confessed Cora oppressed.

Nika nodded her head. Cora was her oldest and best friend, they grew up together in the Unimatrix Zero. They had experienced the same things, seen and listened to the stories of the adults. So they had about the same experience, with only one big difference. In real life, Cora was a Borg drone and Nika the daughter of the Borg queen. As such, Nika had gained much more terrible real experiences than Cora.

Nika sighed deeply.

"Tell me about our new world that we will build together." asked Cora, knowing that it would distract Nika from her current problem.

"Oh Cora, I've told you so many times before." Nika replied tiredly.

"Please do it again, I like listening to you so much."

"Okay, so in the new world, we will first De-assimilate all the drones, and anyone who wants to return to their home world will be allowed to do so. We will elect a supreme council that will ensure order and equality. We will introduce laws and rules that will allow us to live together well. It will be like the stories that we as children have always heard from the adults. We will be free to do what we want to do. To be who we want to be. It will be, as here in the Unimatrix Zero, only that it will be in the real world. Maybe we can trade with other peoples or races. Or maybe we decide to travel further to get to know and explore new things. But that we will decide. Now it is too early. We have to reach the planet and see how we get along." Nika told her eagerly and Cora listened to her and was glad that she could distract Nika.

"That sounds great. I can not believe it will soon be that far." Cora said euphorically.

"Yeah, I can not believe that we managed to escape the Delta Quadrant and are on our way to our new home." Nika said quietly.

Cora looked at her worriedly. "What are you worried about?"

"I worry about what happens when Mother goes looking for us and finds us. She was very angry when I last saw her." Nika replied seriously.

"She will eliminate or assimilate us." Cora whispered imploringly.

"Yes," answered Nika dejectedly.

"Let's go to the others and talk about our new home." Cora held out her hand to Nika and Nika gratefully pulled herself up from Cora. Together they went to the clearing, where a small camp had been built and many others sat around a fire and ate and talked with each other.


	5. Chapter 5

**Past - 9 months with the Borg (Nika almost 8 years old)**

After Nika stopped visiting the children in the maturation chamber, she had explored other places in the Borg cube. So she came to the assimilation chamber a few weeks later.

Curious, she had looked around and found something under the assimilation table. She did not know exactly what it was, but she took it to her Borg chamber.

In her Borg chamber, she connected her assimilation tubes with a computer button and surfed through the now released data for information about what she had found. After hours of searching, she found out what it was. It was a cuddly toy.

*Definition of a cuddly toy: A cuddly toy, stuffed animal or plush toy is a toy made of plush or other soft material in animal or modified fantasy form. Stuffed animals can be consolation dispensers, sleep aids, friends, companions, collectibles and much more.*

After Nika read that, she took the stuffed animal in her hands and looked at it closely. She turned it back and forth, looked at it from all sides exactly. It was not very nice anymore and it had some signs of wear and tear. But it felt good in her hands. Nika took the cuddly toy and smelt it. But she quickly removed it from her nose.

"Uff, you stink. You need a sound shower." Said Nika and went with the cuddle toy in the adjacent bathroom. But before she activated the sound shower, she had a much better idea. She quickly ran back to her Borg chamber and put the stuffed animal in the replicator and recycled it. A few moments later, the cuddly toy appeared and was like new. Happy that her plan had worked, Nika took the cuddly toy and hugged it to her.

Since her cuddly toy was similar to a rabbit, Nika called it Bunny. From then on, Nika always hugged her bunny when she was in her Borg chamber. She told him what her day was, what she had learned, what she had seen and what she had eaten. Then she imagined what Bunny answered her and so they talked together for a long time. Sometimes Nika also began to hum and dance with Bunny in her chamber.

With Bunny even falling asleep was much more bearable and she felt much better with him, by her side. The dreams that had always frightened her before had become less because of the stuffed animal. But then Bunny had disappeared from day to day and Nika could not find it anymore.

Instead, after she had not seen Mother for weeks, she was brought to her. Mother only let her come to her when she did not like something, what Nika had done or if she wanted to teach Nika something new. Otherwise, she did not see her mother very often. What was good.

When she arrived, Mother held Bunny in her hand and looked blankly at Nika. Then she walked slowly to Nika and put her cold hand to her cheek and stroked it. Nika stiffened immediately, because it did not bode well if Mother acted that way.

"This is not for you. You are special and therefore you have certain duties that you have to fulfill. This ... "Mother looked contemptuously at the stuffed animal" stands in the way. You are Borg, you have a duty to behave like a Borg. Emotions and your individual needs for comfort and security are irrelevant. Your neediness is contemptible and undesirable." With that Mother Bunny handed over to a nearby drone. The drone took the stuffed animal and tore it into many small pieces in front of Nika's eyes.

Many tears ran down her cheeks, because Bunny had been the only normal in her life, which made her feel good. When Mother saw the tears, she looked at Nika for a moment, maybe a millisecond, sympathetically. But mentally, shortly afterwards, she ordered a drone to take Nika back to her Borg chamber, where she would reflect on her behavior. Especially crying was a thorn in the eyes from her mother and Nika was aware that this and the illegal possession of a stuffed animal had brought her into trouble.

Without Bunny, Nika felt lonely and alone again in her Borg chamber. So she crawled into the farthest corner and wrapped her arms around her legs, which she had pulled tightly to her, crying out her grief.

The first few times that Mother punished her for this or that, it was still very hard for Nika to control her feelings and not cry in front of her mother. But the older she got and the better she understood how to suppress her emotions, the easier her life became and she was locked up less often in her Borg chamber than at the beginning.

Besides, she had learned from her cuddly toy experience to hide the things she found here and there from Mother. Everything that Mother found irrelevant, Nika hid from then on, in front of her. Whether it was objects or feelings did not matter. Nika became very good at it and eventually, she no longer had to hide emotions and feelings because she had simply stopped feeling something. That was the easiest way.

Only the hatred, on Kathryn Janeway, was a welcome feeling, which was even encouraged by mother in detail. For each punishment received by Nika, Mother cited Kathryn Janeway as the cause and cause. And so the hatred of Janeway grew more and more.

**Present**

The next day Nika had fulfilled her duties as leader of her Borg fleet. She had analyzed all the data, processed it and passed it on to her Borg drones. Their fleet had made good progress to their satisfaction and would reach in three to four days, the planet they had chosen for their new home.

Months ago, Nika had sent three Borg cubes to the Gamma Quadrant in search of an uninhabited planet to become their new home. And now it was soon soon. Full of anticipation, she awaited this event for a long time.

"If only she did not have the problem with Janeway." Nika sighed heavily. She should have killed her on the spot and not taken her, to her new home. You simply did not start a new life by carrying along a legacy. It was like an invitation to destiny to make the new life more complicated than it should have been.

After Nika had completed her duties, she quickly walked in her Borg chamber and deactivated her exoskeleton.

Nika quickly pulled on her robe and lay down on her bed. Her thoughts, like most of the day, wandered to Janeway and her medical record.

"Was it possible that the medical record had been forged and her story was lying? But what if it was true what the medical records said?" Fervently, Nika considers what that would mean to her. "Did it make any difference what was right and what was wrong?"

Nika hated Kathryn Janeway for a very long time. It was therefore impossible for them to believe the reports of the medical record.

"What if they confront Janeway and she would deny everything and if she stayed with her variant of the story? How should she react? Would she know if Janeway was lying?" Nika's thoughts circled around the same topic a hundred times and she was tired of thinking about it any longer.

Annoyed by her thoughts and her inner restlessness, she got up and walked through her room. From an impulse, she activated her exoskeleton again and left her Borg chamber.

Quietly, she opened the door to Janeway's chamber and entered. From the door she looked at the woman she hated. Janeway was 71 years old after medical records and had tried to kill herself several times, in a rather ineffective way.

"How stupid this woman was." Nika thought and took a few steps closer to her. Amira had done a good job, she realized as she saw Janeway now wearing a clean nightgown, her hair and body washed. Now she also smelled a lot more pleasant than the night Nika kidnapped her.

Her white hair was sweaty and stale from her head. Now they were neatly combed and brushed off her face. Nika looked at the gray sickly-looking face, with all its wrinkles here and there, the stern features and the thin lips that mumbled confused stuff in their sleep.

Nika tried to hear meaningful words out of the murmur, but no matter how hard she tried, she did not understand what Janeway was mumbling. One thing was clear, she had not a nice dream, but rather a nightmare.

"Good." Nika thought, should she dream as badly as she herself had lived her whole life.

For a moment, Nika tried to put her hands around Janeway's dry neck and take her life.

"No!" Screamed her inner voice angrily. "Not so, she should be able to look me in the eyes if I kill her and know that it was me who took her life." Disgusted with herself, Nika stepped two Steps back from the bed.

Confused, Nika hastily left Janeway's chamber and hurried back to her chamber.

"And are you feeling better now?" Asked Amira, who was waiting in Nikas chamber.

Nika looked at her in surprise. "What are you doing here? I thought you were in your room and sleeping?"

"I saw you go into Janeway's chamber. I thought, I'm waiting for you here and see how you're doing. And as I thought, you are not doing very well. Come on, I'll help you to relax." said Amira calmly, but Nika looked at her skeptically.

"Amira go, I'm fine, I do not need you." Nika said in a stern tone.

Amira strode over to Nika and clicked on the button that disabled Nika's exoskeleton. Then she put her hand on Nikas bare chest and wanted to stroke it. But Nika grabbed Amira's wrist.

"No, not! Go before I forget myself and hurt you." Nika hissed at her angrily, releasing Amira's wrist in disgust.

Amira grinned cheekily at Nika, then shrugged her shoulders and turned to leave Nika's room without looking back.

Annoyed and inwardly more than angry, Nika locked her Borg chamber with an borg encryption key that Amira could never deactivate.

As far as Nika correctly interpreted, Amira wanted more than just friendship from her. But Nika was not able to give more than what she had to give. She had to lead her Borg fleet and build a new home. She had no time for anything else, nor the necessary feelings or emotions.


	6. Chapter 6

**Past - 2 years with the Borg (Nika 9 years old)**

Nika had been standing by her work console all day studying information, species 2037 inhabiting space grid 204. When Mother questioned her and asked for her opinion on how to most effectively assimilate this species and Nika then gave her her answer, Mother had decided to implement Nika's proposal. As a result, Mother removed her Borg cube from the Unimatrix complex and flew the Borg cube into space grid 204.

Nika had not expected that Mother would do so and looked at her with big eyes. But Mother ignored, as always, Nikas fear. The Borg cube approached Space Grid 204 within two hours. And very quickly, a firefight began between their Borg cube and the species they were about to attack and later assimilate.

Without warning, Nika was torn from her feet moment by moment, flying thirty yards down the hallway and hurled against a work console. In fright, but especially in pain Nika screamed out loud. Immediately a Borg drone came to her, picked her up and brought her back to her mother.

However, Mother ordered the Borg drone to bring Nika to her Borg chamber, as she was busy fending off the attack of the hostile species. On the way to her Borgkammer Nika fainted, because of the pain she had in her arms and in her stomach.

Hours later, Nika was rudely ripped from her sleep by a drone. Facilitated, Nika noticed that her arm and stomach did not hurt as much as before.

The drone brought Nika to her mother. Mother looked at her intently before she spoke.

"Your tactic to assimilating species 2037 failed. We have experienced big losses. Based on your tactical plan, we lost 4,670 Borg drones from 129,000 Borg drones during the firefight. They were in the Borgs sphere shot down by the species before we resigned. There was considerable damage to the Borg cube. You yourself have broken your arm and two of your ribs. Explain your failure!" Mother Nika demanded.

Nika looked concerned and ashamed on the floor. "I'm just a kid." she said softly and helplessly.

"That's your explanation?" Her mother exclaimed angrily. "You're Borg, it's irrelevant if you're a kid or not. You had the necessary data assimilated, analyzed and processed. How is it that you could not work out any promising tactics against species 2037?"

Nika shrugged helplessly and continued to look down, downcast to the ground. Mother approached her, forcing her head up with her hand, and looked her in the eye.

"You are weak and pathetic and corrupted by human needs." Mother hissed at her contemptuously. "You will spend the next time in your Borg Chamber reviewing your behavior and doubling your studies. Furthermore, the drones have put you a new implant while you were fainting. From now, you will be wearing an exoskeleton inside the Borg cube that will protect you from injury. Click here and it will activate. Comply!" Mother commanded her, then released Nika's chin and moved away from her.

After that, Nika was never again in a Borg cube without her exoskeleton, which adapted to her height and had been created especially for her. Furthermore, she had doubled her studies and became more cautious about the tactical plans she had entrusted to her mother.

**Present**

For the past two days, Nikas had continued to study all the sensor data, monitor her fleet, and develop some of her small projects as they made their way to their new home and Amira spent most of her time caring for Janeway.

Nika tried to work as much as possible before they reached the planet. On the one hand, that she was well prepared for everything, and on the other, in order not to have to think about her problem and her previous life. She did well during the day, but in her bed at night, finding it hard to banish the memories and thoughts from her mind.

She had never liked to sleep. She preferred the regeneration, just because of Unimatrix Zero. Since she was only 25 percent Borg and 75 percent human, she had to allow her body to sleep.

Nikas thoughts returned especially in the evening, always back to Janeway. Nikas doubts grew, more and more. Especially the fact that Janeway was so old, confused and sick paralyzed her in her actions. Could she really kill Janeway in this condition?

Nika did not like having no answers to her questions. The only way to get answers was to question Janeway. But would she then learn the truth or just get a lie?

Nika got up again and took the hypospray out of one of her drawers. The hypospray contained modified nanoprobes that she had extracted from her bloodstream in the last two days and crossed with a special rejuvenation drug. She wanted to inject Janeway as soon as possible. Janeway's medical records said she suffered from depression and delusion over the years because of the trauma, her daughter's was kidnapped from the Borg.

The modified nano probes would heal and re-modify everything in Janeway's head and body, which had been damaged in recent years by the many medicines, so that she was restored to a state where she could think and act normally.

And as soon as Janeway was clear, Nika would get her answers.

********************

The next morning, Nika called Amira to her and gave her the hypospray.

Amira looked at it skeptically and turned it back and forth. "What's in there?"

"Modified nanoprobes, they should give a little boost to Janeways and improve their health. Do not worry, she will not be a drone, she will only become a little more of the woman Mother used to tell me. This is the best solution and I get the answers I need faster to decide what to do next. "

"I thought you wanted to kill her. Has your plan changed in this regard?" Amira asked curiously.

"No, I stay with my plan. I just want to hear her story before I kill her." Nika replied gravely. But Amira looked at her doubtfully.

Nika rolled her eyes. "What?" She asked annoyed.

"Hm ... maybe I'm wrong, maybe not, but I really doubt you'll kill Janeway. Nika I've known you for more than 15 years now and you've never done anything to anybody unless your mother forced you to. You are not like that. You hate hurting others." said Amira and Nika glared at her.

"So far, I have hated no one as much as Janeway. Come on and inject her."

"Okay, as you wish. I also wanted to ask you if we can free her from the fixations. For the last two days she has been quiet and has not acted like a savage anymore. She could go to the bathroom on her own and wash herself." Amira said softly.

Nika thought about that for a while before answering Amira. "Yes, okay, but be careful. I'll turn another drone to guard."

********************

As Janeway lay fixed on the bed, Amira could easily hold the hypospray to her neck and inject her with the modified nano-probes. There was quit a moment, but then Janeway gasped in desperation and opened her eyes wide.

"Shht ... it will get better soon." Amira tried to calm her down. But Janeway's body started to twitch wildly and she had difficulty getting enough air. Amira looked anxiously down at Janeway and was about to call Nika for help. But all of a sudden, the twitch stopped and Janeway got enough air in her lungs again. Her skin color, which looked sickly all the time, began to change, as did her entire body.

Where just a sick, old and confused woman lay in bed in front of her, Janeway's body began to undergo a kind of mutation or transformation, similar to an assimilation. Her hair changed her hair color from white to reddish-brown, her wrinkles on her face smoothed and her whole appearance rejuvenated after a few minutes.

Astonished, Amira bit her lower lip and watched the change. Did Nika know that her modified nanoprobes would do that?

After about 20 min. the change had reached its peak. Janeway looked at least 30 years younger and looked at Amira with clear and inquisitive eyes.

"What was in the hypospray?" She asked in a hoarse, rough voice.

"No idea, my mistress gave it to me to make you healthy. She would like to talk to you, so she wanted you to be clear minded." Amira replied before she remembered that she had betrayed too much Janeway, who now looked at Amira in irritation.

"Who is your mistress?" She asked immediately.

"Listen, I can not tell you that, but you'll soon find out for yourself. My mistress has allowed me to release you from your fixations. So you can take care of yourself, go to the toilet alone and wash yourself, eat yourself and move around here in the chamber. However, if you try to do something stupid, you will regret it quickly. Do you understand? "Amira asked sternly and Janeway nodded her head.

"Okay, so I'll get you started now. Do not be nonsense, I'm stronger than I look." Amira warned her again before releasing the fixations of Janeway's wrists.

"When will I meet your mistress?" Kathryn asked shyly.

Amira sighed deeply and looked at Janeway meaningfully.

"Soon enough, do not worry. But if I were you, I would wish to see my mistress later, rather than earlier." Amira said, turned and left the chamber.

********************

Kathryn immediately got out of bed when Amira left the chamber. She felt really good, she had not felt that good in infinite time. When she thought about it, she could not even remember when she'd felt well last time. It had to be before Nikas abduction, she sighed. After that, her life had been a single pain and grief, enveloped in a gray-black veil of grief.

Kathryn strode a few feet through the room, studying everything closely. The walls looked strange and there was nothing in the room but the bed. So she went to the adjacent bathroom and looked around. But there was not much to see. A sound shower, a sink and a toilet, nothing more. Neither toiletries, nor towels, washcloths, mirrors or other things that you needed in the bathroom.

Sighing, Kathryn went back into the room and sat down on the bed.

*Where was she here? And who was the unknown woman she wanted to talk to?*


	7. Chapter 7

**Past - 8 years with the Borg (Nika 15 years old)**

Nika had not seen Mother for a while. Which was not really bad, because whenever she saw mother, terrible things happened. And so it was again. Mother had Nika brought to her and then announced, that she should be present for the first time today during an assimilation.

**************************

Once, when Nika was about 10 years old, she had been on her way to Assimilation Chamber. There she found things from time to time that she could use. But unlike usual, she heard of loud voices calling for help. Instead of going away, Nika was pulled magically by the desperate screams. Slowly she crept to the assimilation chamber and, before she could look away, saw her like a Borg drone, a man stabbing his assimilation tubes in the throat and assimilating him. At first the man tried to fight back, but the drone was stronger than he. Quickly, the nano-probes penetrated his bloodstream and turned him into a Borg drone. Nika never forgot how the man's face was distorted by the pain.

**************************

And now she should be present again at an assimilation. Only the idea alone caused fierce resistance in Nika and endless loathing of this procedure.

"No, I will not comply." Nika said loud and clear. Mother looked at her with an icy look.

"You will Comply!" She ordered again, but Nika shook her head. "No!"

Mentally, Mother ordered two Borg drones to take Nika to the assimilation chamber. Once there, the one drone on Mother's orders held Nikas wrist on the neck of a man to be assimilated. Nika tried desperately to get out of the grip of the drone. But she was too weak again.

Nikas assimilation tubes immediately pierced the skin and permeated them with ease. As soon as her assimilation tubes connected with the individual's nerve tracts, both her victim and Nika felt an infinite pain running through their bodies and paralyzing them. Nikas first assimilation was the worst thing she had ever known. Disgusted, she had to hand over immediately after their assimilation tubes had come free from the neck of their victim.

**Present**

As soon as Amira arrived at the Borgcubus Bridge, she saw Nika at the tactical phalanx, connected through their assimilation tubes and thus unavailable for a while.

Sighing, Amira sought a quiet corner and waited for Nika to finish what she was doing. She looked at them closely. Nika stood focused and with a firm, closed expression to the console and her eyes, which were open, looked into the void. She was fully connected to the Borg Hive. In this state, she was mentally connected to her five million Borg drones, she saw everything, heard everything and knew everything.

If Amira went to her now and touched her, Nika would not really notice. For a brief moment, Amira thought about her idea, but then quickly rejected it.

Amira had known Nika for more than fifteen years and during that time, Nika had resisted physical closeness and strictly rejected her.

And secretly, she enjoyed jiggling Nika now and then with small touches here and there. Nika then always reacted very annoyed, glared at her and threatened her with punishment. But Nika had never punished anyone like that. That was not her style.

And to be honest, Amira also seriously doubted that Nika Janeway could kill. She believed that Nika would never do it. And if that happened, Amira had been given the task by the Borg queen to kill Nika in front of Janeway. On the one hand to torment Janeway even more and to take revenge on her and on the other hand, because Nika would have failed in this case again and forfeited their actual entitlement to life.

For many years, Amira had been feverishly waiting for her job to finally be able to return to her true purpose. But for now, she had to continue her patience and pretend that she was Nika's friend and confidante.


	8. Chapter 8

**Past - 11 years with the Borg (Nika 18 years old)**

Nika and her Borg Scout ship were on a reconnaissance mission. It had cost Nika quite a bit of persuasion to get Mother to allow Nika to do this mission. But in the end she had agreed. They were just heading home to the Unimatrix complex when an Ion Storm completely unexpectedly encircled them and her scout ship was irreparably damaged. With the last energy reserve and a lot of luck, the scout ship was able to reach a class M planet with great difficulty.

Immediately a communication beacon was set up, which sent an emergency signal to the Borg.

While Nika and her four Borg drones were waiting to be rescued, the Borg drones regained some of their individuality by being separated from the collective. That was okay for Nika. Attentively, she listened to the Borg drones recapturing pieces of her memories of her previous life and telling them in the round about the campfire they had built up.

So no one noticed how quietly someone approached them from behind.

"Hello?" Came a soft greeting, all the drones and Nika turned in the direction from which the greeting came.

In front of them stood a slim woman with short brown hair and looked at her in a friendly way.

Nika looked at the strange woman in skeptical. "Who are you and what are you doing here?" She asked curiously.

"I´m Amira and I've been left behind on this lonely planet." the woman replied and took a few steps closer to look closely at Nika and her Borg drones.

"May I sit down at you?" She asked shyly.

"Hm ... well, yes, but we are Borg. Do you know who the Borg are and what we do?" Nika asked curiously.

Amira then gave Nika a friendly smile. "Yes, I know who the Borg are, but I'm not afraid of you. You can not assimilate me." Amira declared confidently.

"Oh, why can not we assimilate you?" Nika asked irritated.

"Because I'm a cyborg, I'm 99% technology, only my skin is humanoid. And as far as I know, Borg assimilates humanoids and no artificial intelligence." Amira replied and looked at Nika in a friendly manner.

Nika swallowed, twice, then nodded her head. "Yes you are right. Why are you here alone?"

"The humanoids who created me got scared of me and brought me here. That was a few years ago and I was very bored. Please allow me to stay in your company while you are here." said Amira and Nika thought about it.

"Okay, whatever you want. Why did your people who created you get scared of you?" Nika asked curiously.

"That should, I bet better not betrayed, otherwise you will also be afraid of me." Amira said softly.

But Nika laughed out loud. "We are Borg, we are not afraid of anything or anyone in this galaxy. So come tell us." Nika Amira called again.

"I killed." Amira replied, clearly seeing her confession startle Nika.

"You see, now you're scared of me too." she said disappointed.

"I'm Borg. I'm not afraid of anything." Nika said confidently, but Amira could see the truth behind her words and smiled gently at her.

"You do not look like the other Borg drones."

"I know." Nika sighed heavily and hung her head.

Amira walked over to her and put her hand on Nika's shoulders. Nika flinched and quickly turned away from Amira.

"Stop that, I'm not used to touch and I do not want it. If you want to stay here with us, you can do that. However, never touch me again. Do you understand? "Nika asked angrily.

"Yes." Amira answered only and sat down to the Borg drones by the campfire.

****************************

It took 4 days for to rescue, Nika, her Borg drones and Amira from a Borgsphere. In the meantime, Nika had enjoyed sleeping under the open skies, taking long walks through the countryside and feeling free. When the Borgsphere came, she regretted basing herself on a communication beacon and having to go back to the collective.

Amira had joined them and had a very long conversation with Mother. But Nika not be present. But at the end of the conversation, Amira came to her and told her beaming that she would stay with her and the Borg from now on. That her mother had decided that Amira from now on should be her friend, confidante and servant.

Nika received this message with mixed feelings. For one, she was not used to being with someone else on a permanent basis, and for another, she did not trust Amira. Therefore, in the following years, she kept as much secret as possible in front of her.

**Present**

"Amira, how is Janeway?" Nika asked immediately after she had logged off the tactical phalanx and was physically and mentally present again.

"Oh, she's fine. Why did not you say that Janeway would rejuvenate through the modified nano-probes?" Amira asked angrily.

Nika frowned at Amira. "I was not aware that I owe you an report." Hissed Nika Amira angrily.

"No, not that, but it would have been good to know." Amira explained a little more quietly.

"I want to see her, bring her to me." Nika demanded, ignoring Amira's objections.

Amira looked at her irritated. "You want to see her now?" She asked in astonishment.

"Yes, why not? You said she was fine, so why postpone a meeting for a long time if it can happen now?"

Amira opened her mouth and closed it again. As she did so, she wondered what would happen next and how she should react properly.

"Amira?" Nika asked impatiently.

"No, you are completely right. I'll get her.” Amira relied after she quickly made a plan.

"Good, then get her and leave us alone then." Nika explained, but Amira stopped dead in her tracks.

"I should leave you alone then? Do you think that's the right approach?"

"Yes. Amira what's up, why are you against everything I say today? Are you intentionally angering me?"

"No of course not. I just do not like the fact that it's too early, that you step in front of her and then leave you alone too. I'm just worried about you." Amira explained and gave Nika a friendly look.

Nika sighed deeply. "There will never be a right time to meet Janeway, so it does not matter when I meet her." Nika replied firmly. "Go get her now."

Sighing, Amira turned and then left the bridge of the Borg cube.

Nika, on the other hand, nervously wondered if Amira had been wrong and a meeting was not too early. The last time she was so nervous, she had confessed her mother, who wanted to leave with her Borg drones, the collective, to start a new collective.


	9. Chapter 9

**A few days ago (Nika 33 years old)**

There had been a big argument with Mother before Nika and her Borgfleet could make their way to a new future. Mother had become a fury when Nika told her that she wanted to take her Borg drones to a new territory to build a new collective there. Mother was so angry that she had even forgotten for a moment that Nika was not alone.

The last time Nika saw her mother, Mother had brutally pushed her to the bulkhead and her assimilation tubes had come out, wriggling out of her wrist. But before she could reach Nika's throat, one of her Borg drones had intervened and pushed away the Borg queen of Nika. Mother flew three feet through the air and smashed into the nearest work console.

That was when Nika finally broke with her mother, gathered her Borg drones and fled the collective.

Her Borg drones were really loyal to her and a big thorn in Mother's eyes.

It was ironic how Nika's first Borg drones came to be. At the age of 15, she hab Nika forced her to attend the assimilation of a new species. Since Nika had refused to attend, her mother had forced her to perform the assimilation herself.

At that time, neither mother nor Nika had known that Nika had both a recessive mutation in her body and an anomaly in her central nervous system that had been transferred to her first victim. And with every further assimilation by Nika or her victims of assimilation, even more Borg drones emerged that had this anomaly.

This is how a completely new Borgdrohne generation came into existence. Nikas Borgdrohnen was influenced by her and only she was mentally connected to them in Hive consciousness. At first, her mother had been unaware, but as more and more strange incidents occurred in the collective, her mother began to investigate.

Nika smiled as she remembered how angry Mother was when she found out. Unfortunately, Nikas Borg drone could hardly be distinguished from Mother's Borg drones, so Mother could not locate Nikas Borg drone. She had made many attempts to track them down and eliminate them, but that failed.

Only Nika alone knew who belonged to her and who did not. But she had never shared that advantage with her mother. Nika was connected to the Hive Consciousness, but her anomaly allowed her to disconnect at any time without Mother ever having heard. Nika herself had not been aware for a long time that only she could do it, and nobody else was standing in it. And so she was able to hide many of her secrets from Mother.

Another secret was Unimatrix Zero. There was a long time ago the plan to escape from the collective. After Nika, through her knowledge of her studies over the past few years, developed a nanovirus that released her in the central plexus, thousands of Borg drones have been separated from Hive consciousness. So the drones, with the recessive mutation, could become aware of their self and infiltrate and take over Borgcubes together with Nikas Borg drone.

So could Nika, her Borg drones, which now made up in the seventh generation of five million Borg drone, as well as the thousands Borg drone of Unimatrix Zero, the collective leave her mother.

**Present**

Amira rushed quickly into the chamber of Janeway.

"My mistress wants to see you, put this on." Amira demanded and put some things on the bed.

Kathryn took a close look at the clothes before pulling pants and a sweater.

"What's happening? Why are you so excited?" Kathryn asked in surprise as she dressed.

"You wanted to meet my mistress, so do not ask so much, but put them on, so I can bring you to her quickly." Amira replied annoyed.

Kathryn then looked at Amira in surprise, but instead of responding to something, she dressed herself even faster.

As soon as she was finished, she pulled Amira out of the room.

As soon as Kathryn saw the Borg drone and the green-lit corridor, she went pale.

"We're with the Borg?" She asked angrily and Amira smiled crookedly at her.

"Yes, what a surprise, is not it?" She replied and hurried down the hall. The Borg drone pushed Kathryn from behind so she had to move too.

"But why am I here and not yet assimilated?" She asked loudly so Amira could hear her.

Amira stopped and looked at Kathryn seriously. "My mistress will explain everything to you. Come, my mistress was reluctant to wait." Amira instructed her and Kathryn swallowed several times.

After a long walk back through the Borg cube, Amira stopped at a door. "From here, you have to go on alone. My mistress wishes to speak you alone. But do not forget where you are and that you should not nonsense at all, you'll be sorry." With that Amira opened the door by entering a code on the door button.

Hissing, the door opened and Kathryn stood uncertainly in front of it. But the Borg drone nudged her, so she had to go further.


	10. Chapter 10

**Presence**

Kathryn stepped shakily into the great room, expecting to stand opposite the Borg queen at any moment. But when Seven stood before her, she could not believe her eyes and had to blink several times. She had not seen Seven for so long, but she had never forgotten her face over the years. Not a day had passed when she had not thought of Seven and had missed her terribly.

She stepped quickly to her and reached out to touch Seven's cheek.

However, Nika took a step back and raised her arms defensively. "Stop!" She called outraged. And Kathryn looked at her irritated.

"Seven?" She asked confused.

"No, Nika!"

"Nika?" Kathryn whispered quietly and painfully. "I thought they had assimilated you." Tears broke from Kathryn's eyes and rolled down her cheeks.

Nika tried to ignore the tears and straightened up a bit.

"I have had you brought here to pay for your guilt with death. But first I want to hear your side of the story. So what happened past?" Nika wanted to know.

Kathryn looked at her blankly and remained silent.

"Speak!" Nika encouraged her again.

"I ... I'm not sure what you mean exactly. Please explain it to me." Kathryn asked calmly.

"Mother told me that you sold me for two transwarp coils to the Borg after I no longer had any use for you, so you could return to the Alpha Quadrant faster with your spaceship. Now you have the opportunity to tell me what really happened past." Nika explained and looked at Kathryn.

Kathryn shook her head in bewilderment about that big lie, and did not know how to explain to Nika what had really happened back then.

"Do you really want to know the truth?" She asked quietly and sighed heavily.

"Yes, that's why you're here. I could have killed you a couple of times in the hospital or here in the Borg cube, if only it had been what I wanted." Nika declared angrily and attacked Kathryn angrily.

Nika pushed her against a bulkhead wall and pressed her hard against it. "Tell me what I want to know!" She urged urgently.

Kathryn's heart began beating faster, desperately trying to catch her breath.

"I ..., please ... I ..." she stuttered desperately and only then did Nika realize that she pushed Kathryn too hard against the bulkhead wall and she could not breathe. So she let go of Kathryn and took a step back.

"Thank you." Kathryn whispered, after she got enough air again.

Nika looked at her with icy eyes. "Tell me your truth or I'll kill you on the spot." Nika hissed at her angrily.

"If you really want to kill me, then you should do it. It makes no difference if you know my variant of events then or not." Kathryn replied bravely.

"But it makes a difference to me. So tell me what I want to know." Nika replied, frustrated and annoyed.

Kathryn sighed deeply again and looked at Nika with tear-stained eyes.

"Back when I lost Seven in the transporter accident, my heart broke. I was in love with her, but as captain I should not give in to my feelings and get involved with a crewmember. But I got you. A little shy girl, but also a very stubborn girl. I locked you in my heart and loved you like my own daughter. When the Borg kidnapped you, my world collapsed again and well, you saw me in the hospital, did not you?" Kathryn Nika asked, nodding silently with her head.

"To stand here in front of you, to look into your eyes and to see in it all your grief and sorrow, hurts me a lot. I can not imagine what it was like for you as a child to grow up on a Borg cube. Without love, comfort, encouragement. I can understand that you hate me and want to kill me." Kathryn said in a broken hotter voice.

"I should never have stopped looking for you to save you. I have failed. Your desire to kill me is justified. Please, you are free to do it. My life has stopped making sense long ago. When the Borg drones pulled you out of my arms and kidnapped you, my life was over and nothing worth anything without you." Kathryn said dejectedly.

Nika looked at Kathryn desperately. As her legs gave out, Nika fall to the ground. All the loneliness, the pain, the grief and the suffering, the last 26 years broke out of her inner, where she had kept hidden behind thick walls for years. Desperate, she held her hands in front of her face and cried for the first time in 22 years.

Kathryn knelt down quickly and took Nika in her arms and murmured comforting words to calm Nika.

For a little while, Nika forgot who she was and let Kathryn touch her. But the longer she sat on the floor and wept, the more Nika regained her composure and her Borgerziehung gained the upper hand. Whereupon she stiffened and pushed Kathryn away from herself.

"I'm Borg, I do not need comfort." she said in an icy voice, rising from the floor and glaring at Kathryn.

"These are human needs that poison my mind. Do not you dare touch me again." she hissed angrily.

Kathryn looked sadly at Nika and nodded her head. "Will you kill me now?" She asked softly.

Nika, who had turned away from Kathryn to regain her feelings, quickly looked back at her. But she had no answer to Kathryn's question at the moment. Throughout the years, she had hated Janeway from the bottom of her heart for everything she had experienced and suffered over the past 26 years. Her plan to find her and kill her had made her survive and endure all those years. But now that she knew Janeway's version of the truth, Nika no longer knew if she wanted or could kill her.

Mentally, she called two of her Borg drones to her. When the door opened and the two entered, Amira came rushing in and quickly approached Nika.

"Nika, are you all right? Why is she still alive?" Amira asked angrily when she saw Kathryn standing in front of Nika.

Nika ignored Armia as she mentally instructed her Borg drones to bring Janeway back to her chamber. After they were both alone, Nika turned to Amira and looked at her blankly.

"I can not kill her. I have failed. You have to do the job of my mother." Nika said with a blank expression.

Amira looked at her, irritated and surprised. "What do you mean?" She asked curiously.

"I know about the deal you have with Mother. I know you should kill me if I can not kill Janeway. So do what you need to do." Nika said quietly, deactivating her exoskeleton and kneeling down in front of Amira.

Amira looked at Nika crookedly. "How do you know about my mission?"

"That's irrelevant. Just kill me." Nika replied exhausted and tired. And waited for Amira to end her life.

Amira looked at Nika stunned and knelt down to her. Then she lifted Nikas chin with her hand and looked into her expressionless eyes.

"I can not kill you like this. Janeway has to be present and watch. Your death would be pointless if she is not there to look." she said softly. "Let them bring back and I'll fulfill your wish." Amira explained in a friendly voice.

But before she knew it, four Borg drones came into the room and arrested her. Amira tried to break free, but the Borg drones were too strong for her.

"Nika?" She exclaimed in surprise, but Nika turned away from her. "If you do not want to kill me, then you have to leave my Borg cube." she said softly and left the room.

"Nikaaaaaaaaaaa!" Screamed Amira desperately back. "Please do not do that!"

But the Borg drones took Amira on to the Borg Scout ship and left the Borg cube with her to drop her off somewhere nowhere and then rejoin the Borg cube.


	11. Chapter 11

**6 months later**

Personal logbook by Kathryn Janeway:

It has now been six months since I met Nika for the first time in 26 years.

A few days later we reached a planet. At first I thought in fear and anger that Nika and her Borg fleet wanted to assimilate the planet and its species. I was very upset and confronted her with my anger. But she just looked at me unemotionally and replied calmly that they did not want to assimilate the planet, but colonize it. That's why she brought her Borg fleet here.

At that time I looked at her surprised and could not reconcile it with my previous knowledge of the Borg. But I was wrong, which had made me very relieved. Two weeks after we reached the planet, Nika sent me there. So I got the resettlement in full with. 

Seventy Borg cubes immediately landed on the planet, which was very similar to the earth, both in the animal and in the plant world, and spread for a time close to each other, on it. The central plexus on each Borg cube was destroyed and each Borg drone, the five million strong Borg army, regained its individuality.

First, the Supreme Council was formed, which consisted of 12 council members, which set laws and rules and thus allowed a common living together of the different species. The territory where the seventy Borg cubes had landed was divided into four zones. The alpha, beta, gamma and delta zone were called. All former Borg drones now settled in the area they originally came from. The different species have come together to their own species and together have built their own camp. In each zone, the different peoples / races tried to come to terms with each other. The Supreme Council tried to mediate in disputes, which generally worked well.

The individual zones, however, were only temporary. Once the de-assimilation of all former Borg drones had been shot down, which would certainly take over a year, and everyone had decided whether to stay or return to his original home world, the zones would be lifted and everyone could settle there, according to individual needs and preferences, where he or she liked it.

In each zone, a central registration center was set up, where each former drone called and registered. There, the former drone received a number that was important for de-assimilation.

After the medical centers were set up in each zone, de-assimilation began gradually. First, all former drones with medical knowledge were freed from their Borg implants and then the rest. It is a very slow process with five million drones. By now, about 35 percent have regained their original appearance.

But many of the former Borg drones want to return to their home world. Only a small part, is ready to stay here. Those who want to stay are especially those who grew up in the Borg collective and can not yet begin with their individuality.

I met some of them and they remind me very much of Seven, as she was when I got her out of the Borg collective back then. The Supreme Council, took the problem of these former drones, which accounted for about 5 percent of the total population, very seriously. Each of them, therefore, was given a mentor to help him or her. The children who remained in the maturing chamber when Nika carried her Borg drones from her mother's collective were largely returned to her parents when they were also on the planet. If this was not possible, it was looked at who took it instead. Thus, the approximately 15,000 children had been quickly admitted to the appropriate zones of their own species.

In the individual zones, schools or childcare centers gradually developed.

Now that 35 percent of the population is de-assimilated, many have begun to pursue their jobs in their respective occupations. So on the planet, which still has not got any names from us, we have doctors, scientists, teachers, landscape reformers, but fortunately also conselors who offered their services.

The former Borg drones had set up tent-like provisional tent shelters very quickly. As soon as I arrived on the planet, I moved into one of these accommodations and helped where I needed. I even met some former Starfleet officers and Earth dwellers on the planet. Together we built a small community in recent months. It's not clear who will be staying with my new friends or returning to the Alpha Quadrant.

Fifty Borg cubes remained in orbit for the first four months, creating a protective shield around the planet. Nikas cubes was one of them.

Nika looks so much like Seven and sometimes, I could discover a piece of Seven in her. But Nika is much more reserved and quiet than Seven has ever been. She worked very hard and hardly allowed herself any rest at the time when I was on her Borg cube.

Nika has experienced a lot of terrible things in her life with the Borg. I wish she would talk to me about it. Every time she saw me, she stiffened and kept her distance from me. She often seemed to me like a shy deer, which instantly disappeared or hid behind her borg mask and exoskeleton as soon as I came near her. I think that's why she sent me to the planet as fast as possible.

Two weeks ago, Nikas cubes finally landed on the planet. Nikas Borg cube was the last one still in orbit. Why she waited so long, I can only guess. I think she was afraid to face her former Borg drones. But this fear, if she really had it, was unfounded. Nika is celebrated as a heroine everywhere, because she had led her Borg fleet into freedom.

Ever since Nika landed on the planet with her Borg cube, I've tried to find out where she is and in which zone she's settled. There was and is different information. Most of them boil down to being in the D Zone. Now I have been on my way there for some days, which is about twenty days away from my A Zone. The beginning spring weather is very pleasant during my hike. It is neither too cold nor too warm. Just the right climate for traveling.

On my way to the D Zone, I noticed that there is a lot of traffic between the zones and many were on the way. Some former Borg drones, who now call the liberated yourself, seemed to wander from zone to zone to find missing relatives again, or to obtain a faster de-assimilation date, which was not possible.

I hope I find Nika in the D Zone.

Logbook entry end.

**2 months later**

Personal logbook by Kathryn Janeway:

It's been two months since I left the A Zone to search the D Zone Nika. Five weeks ago I arrived in the D Zone and went in search of her, but she had not contacted the registration center.

I was assigned a place to live, and every day I went in search of former Borg drones that had served on Nikas Borg cube.

Every day since then, I visited the central market, which had become a popular meeting place. They met there, exchanged or traded with each other.

It had taken me a few weeks to figure out which Liberated had been on Nikas Borg cube and then track them down. But a few days ago, I finally managed to meet someone who could give me accurate information.

According to this information, Nika was in the D Zone for a very short time, not more than 3 days, before she left alone and left the D Zone. According to the information, however, she had left the D zone in the direction of the unknown country. In the direction of the mountain group and the forests, which were in southern direction.

So I got weatherproof clothes, a back pack with enough provisions for the first days, suitable hiking boots, a walking stick and everything else I needed to find Nika.

In the D Zone, I quickly got the impression that it was important there for most of the former Borg drones that I found Nika. After all, Nika was her leader who had led her to freedom. Their disappearance therefore unsettled many of the liberated. There was even a group of liberated who wanted to join me in my search for Nika. But I refused.

From a former Borg drone I received a tracking device, which could scan for Borg signatures. I really hope that I can find Nika with it.  
Logbook entry end.

**10 days later**

Personal logbook by Kathryn Janeway:

I've been on the road for ten days and still have not found Nika. I have crossed several small forests and slowly approach the mountains, which I could already see from the beginning at the beginning of my journey in the D Zone. I hope I find Nika before I reach the mountains. I'm not equipped enough to survive in a mountain and successfully climb it.

In front of the mountains is still a big huge forest. I hope that there are no bigger and more dangerous animals. My physical condition, wandering through the countryside after ten days, is no longer suitable for meeting them.  
Logbook entry end.


	12. Chapter 12

Kathryn had been out all day, and for several hours in the big forest she had been.

*Past, that was before an infinity* Kathryn thought through her mind, she had from Chakotay learned to read the track, on a lonely planet in the Delta Quadrant. This knowledge had helped her a lot in the last few days. In addition, the tracking device, which finally showed Borg signatures, let her hope to find Nika soon.

Completely lost in thought, tired and exhausted from the many hikes since the morning hours and a short lunch break in between, Kathryn did not really pay attention to where she put her feet down on the forest floor. All the more surprised she was when she was suddenly blown into the air and seconds later, hanging in a safety net, about two feet above the forest floor.

Cursing, she tried to free herself for a while before she gave up exhausted. She had stashed her knife in her backpack when she did not need it after lunch. And her backpack was strapped to her back. That would not have been a problem if she had not been held in a safety net like in a press sausage and could not move.

"Help, help, please help me!" Kathryn exclaimed desperately, but the more she called for help, the more her voice became scratchier and rougher. Kathryn very much hoped that the one who had set this trap would soon come and rescue her. Furthermore, she hoped that this someone was well-disposed to her.

"Was the planet actually populated? Shit." Kathryn cursed, in all the months since she was here on the planet, she had not come up with the idea to ask if the planet was uninhabited or if there was a local population here. How ignorant she had become.

While Kathryn, trapped in her net, was reviewing her current situation and trying to pull and tug on the ropes of the net to perhaps break her, the sun slowly set. As soon as it got dark in the forest, Kathryn could not even see her own hand in front of her face. But she heard more and more sounds. Cracking branches, rustling leaves, isolated animal sounds and different bird cries.

Kathryn had never been afraid in her life. As far as she could remember, she had always been curious and had tried to explore as much as possible. But that had already been over 30 years since she had actively participated in life.

For the last few weeks, while she was on her way to the D Zone and then wandering around the countryside looking for Nika, she found she was physically fit, through this hypospray that she had injected a few months ago with modified nanosensors but purely from the psychological point of view she had become a little coward. Often she found herself thinking carefully in which direction the path was more pleasant and with which people, she was better and safer on the way. She sometimes wondered too long and too many, often wasting precious time with it.

All the worse, what is it now, stuck in those stupid traps. * Why did not she just pay attention where she stepped? Why had not she stopped earlier and pitched her camp? * Questions about questions shot Kathryn in the head, but unfortunately none of these questions improved her current situation.

**************************

At some point during the night, Kathryn had fallen asleep in her uncomfortable posture. She was all the more surprised when she noticed a shaking. Immediately, she tore open her sleepy eyes and blinked at the sunlight shining down through the trees.

Slowly the net was lowered and shortly thereafter Kathryn sat on the forest floor. Painfully, she tried to stretch her cramped limbs. Then she looked up.

Nika stood in front of her and looked at her questioningly.

"What are you doing here?" She asked a little annoyed.

Kathryn rubbed the remaining sleep out of her eyes and tried to get up. Which was very difficult for her at first. Still, she tried to get it as elegantly as possible, hoping that Nika would not notice she had shaky legs.  
"I was looking for you," Kathryn said as she brushed the dirt off her clothes.

"Why?" Nika asked irritated.

"Because I wanted to know how you are and where you are." Kathryn answered gently.

Nika shook her head before answering. "I'm fine." she said softly, returning the trap to the forest floor as she needed it again.

Then she took her backpack, which she had set aside, shouldered him and then went on with fast steps into the forest, without looking back again. Kathryn looked after her in surprise, but then quickly remembered and hastened to follow Nika.

Throughout the morning, Nika ran ahead and stopped at the various locations in the forest and checked their traps. The trapped small animals, killing them quickly and as painlessly as possible, then put them in a sack she held in her hand.

Kathryn had her need to keep up with her.

*No, now that she finally found Nika, she would not be shaken off easily* Kathryn vowed.

At noon, both women arrived at a lake. Nika removed her backpack from her shoulders, put his aside, and to Kathryn's surprise, she completely undressed her clothes, which were made of a coarse fabric in camouflage look, except for her panties. After that, she jumped into the lake and dived for a short while.

Kathryn then also grazed her backpack from her shoulders and knelt down by the water and washed her sweaty face, hands and arms.

Nika appeared shortly afterwards and threw something at the lake shore. Astonished, Kathryn looked at the wriggling fish that landed only two or three paces from her. To stop tormenting the fish, Kathryn quickly hunted down a thick club and killed the fish with a deliberate punch. But no sooner had she finished, Nika had already thrown the next fish at her.

After seven fish lay dead before Kathryn on the forest floor, Nika swam leisurely through the lake before she came out of the lake naked and went to Kathryn without shame.

Nikas wet hair covered her bare chest and relieved Kathryn breathed deeply in and out. But then Nika gathered her wet hair and stroked the water out of them and put it back on her back.

So Kathryn had a clear view of Nikas bare breasts, her slender belly and her abdominal implant. Confused as a warm wave spread in her crotch, Kathryn looked embarrassed and tried to breathe in and out.

Meanwhile, Nika gathered some hand-sized stones and laid them on the forest floor to a circle. Then she searched for small twigs and branches, which she built in this stone circle to a small campfire and lit a small fire.

The fish then speared them on a thick branch, after cutting them with a knife and removing their innards, and draped them over the fire so that all the fish were evenly fried. As she worked, the sunbeams dried her bare wet skin.

When Nika was dry enough, she took off her panties and pulled out of her backpack a dry panties and put him and her other clothes back on.

After that she continued to monitor the fish. Kathryn opened her mouth several times and was trying to start a conversation with Nika. But again and again she closed her mouth and stayed, just as quiet as Nika.

After the fish had been sizzling for a while, Nika took a dinnerware set from her backpack, put two fish on it and handed it to Kathryn.

Kathryn looked at Nika in surprise, but then took the plate of fish. "Thanks." she said kindly to Nika and smiled gently at her. But Nikas eyes turned quickly away from her and returned to the fire.

Nika himself took only a fish in her hand and nibbled at it listlessly. After she had finished, she put the remaining fishs in a container and put it in her backpack. Then she put out the fire, washed her hands in the lake, and prepared to leave.

Kathryn quickly washed her crockery in the lake and stowed it in her backpack and then hurried after Nika, who was already several meters away from her, in the forest between the different trees.

Again, both women walked for a few hours through the forest in complete silence. Nika checked more traps and her bag filled with more and more small animals.

As the sun slowly set, Nika suddenly stopped and put aside the sack she had filled with small animals all day. Exhausted Kathryn also stopped and sat down wearily on the forest floor in the hope that she could rest here before Nika wanted to go further. Even more she hoped that they would set their night here here. She was all the more surprised when Nika lifted a bush in front of her and lifted her to side.

Kathryn saw with wide eyes how suddenly a big cat-like animal jumped out of the room, which was hidden behind the bush, and tore Nika to the ground. A sharp scream of fear escaped her mouth and she quickly tried to get up off the floor. Meanwhile, Nika fought and wrestled with the big animal.

After Kathryn had finally straightened up and stormed Nika and the animal with her walking stick, she was astonished that Nika squeezed the animal and the animal licked her face with a smack. On Nikas, otherwise so serious face, a big smile was to see, which Kathryns heart melted, as she looked at it exactly. Looking closely, Kathryn saw that the animal had a bandage on its hind leg.

After a while, Nika broke away from the animal and pulled her backpack and bag up. From the backpack she fetched the container of fried fish and fed the animal with it. After the four fish were quickly engulfed, Nika opened her sack and shook out all the small animals that were in it. As soon as they lay on the forest floor, the animal lunged and chewed on it with relish. Nika smiled at the animal, before she took her backpack and went to the cave, which had been hidden behind the bush.

Kathryn was still sitting unsteadily on the forest floor and did not move, fearing that the animal, as soon as it had eaten, might still be hungry and then attack her.

When the animal finished eating, it yawned and strolled a few feet away and then rolled up into a nest of branches, twigs and grass, and closed its eyes.

Kathryn eased away from the forest floor and strode calmly to the opening where Nika had disappeared a while ago. Since the opening was a little smaller than herself, she had to bend a little to get inside. But as soon as she did, a huge lamp-lit cave spread in front of her. Amazed, Kathryn looked around. At the back of the mountain wall stood a bed made up of thick branches. There was a massive wooden table, a chair, several wooden shelves that held a variety of things. Most containers, of unknown content. Dangled from the cave ceiling, on the other side several grasses and bouquets tied together. Underneath, strangely looking dried moss lay on another shelf.

Nika was standing on a shelf and was just putting in various containers, which she pulled out of her backpack.

"Why?" She asked softly.

Kathryn looked at her in surprise, since she had not heard Nika speak since this morning.

"Why what?" She asked in a raspy and rough voice.

"Why, do you follow me all day? What do you want from me?" Nika asked, now a little louder and more angry.

Kathryn sighed deeply before answering. "I was looking for you because I wanted to know how you are doing." she replied calmly and quietly.

Nika glared at her blankly. "I already told you this morning that I'm fine. So what do you want from me? Why are you following me?"

"I was worried about you. Not only did I want to know how you are, but also where you are and what you are doing." Kathryn explained and looked at Nika with a sad look.

Nika, however, turned away from her and continued to put their things on the shelf. "You know now that I am fine, where I am and what I am doing. Go back now!" She demanded icily.

"I can not do that. For one, it's dark outside soon, and another, I have no idea how to find myself alone. Besides …" Kathryn stopped and looked closely at Nikas back. "I do not want to leave. I lost you a long time ago and then found you again or you did find me. And, well, I'm not ready to go now and let you down again. There's also no place else I want to be." Kathryn confessed softly and Nikas back, her shoulders, everything tensed up.

Nika looked back at Kathryn and studied her closely.

"So you will not go, no matter how much I wish it?" She asked emotionless.

Tears were already gathering in Kathryn's eyes, which she could still hold back with all her strength.

"No, I will stay." She said strong and courageous. In her heart she wondered what Nika would do now. Would she kill Kathryn now? And if so, what did that matter?

Nika did not look happy at Kathryn's reply, but then shrugged her shoulders, took a container off the shelf and quickly left the cave.

Kathryn looked after her in surprise. Quickly she took her backpack from her shoulder, set it aside and crawled out of the cave entrance to the outside. By now it had almost become dark. But in the short time she was out, Nika had lit a fire in the fireplace, which was just a few feet away from the cave.

Kathryn walked up to her and sat down a bit away from her by the fire.

"Can we talk?" Kathryn asked after a while as they both sat silently by the fire.

"No!" She said curtly and continued to look motionless into the fire. The feline animal had settled next to her and Nika stroked gently through his fur. She looked relaxed and maybe even a little happy.

Looking closer, Kathryn could see that the animal looked like a puma. How dangerous or how tame it was, she could not assess. Therefore, she continued to look at the animal suspiciously.

Nika, on the other hand, took the container that had stood beside her on the forest floor and opened it. A pleasant smell immediately escaped the container, causing Kathryn's stomach to contract. She had not noticed anything the whole day, but now she realized how hungry she was. Immediately her stomach began to protest and growled loudly. Nika looked at her in surprise. Then she took some strips of dried meat out of the container and handed them to Kathryn, whom she gladly accepted.

"Thanks." she whispered softly and Nika now gave her puma some strips of dry meat.

"You should not give the animal so much to eat." Kathryn said casually and chewed on her dried meat.

"Why?" Nika asked curiously and looked at Kathryn irritated.

"Because it could get too thick and because otherwise it will no longer be foraging alone. And dried meat could also be unhealthy for the animal. Wild animals hunt and eat, the meat is raw, they are used to this species only. So you bring the animal a completely wrong diet." Kathryn explained calmly.

Nika looked at Kathryn in shock and immediately took away the dried meat from the cougar.

"How do you know all this?" Nika asked.

"Before, when I lived on earth and was still young, I had a dog myself. And with his faithful brown dog eyes, he has always begged for goodies. I could not refuse this dog and therefore gave him everything he wanted. But these treats did not do him any good and even made him ill. The veterinarian scolded me a lot and then I had to give the dog a strict diet. That was healthy, it hurt me and the dog a lot because I had to be so strict with him. Therefore, it is better if you do not get used to treats such as dried meat." Kathryn explained and Nika looked at her shamefully.

"I did not know that." Nika said guiltily, hanging her head. Kathryn looked at her sadly and would have liked to go over to her to hug her and calm her. But she remembered too well that Nika did not want any touches and she refused.

"Do not worry, the animal does not look very fat yet. How long has it been with you?" Kathryn asked curiously.

"About two weeks." Nika replied, looking closely at the animal. "It got caught and injured in one of my traps." she added guiltily.

"How did it get so tame?" Kathryn asked curiously, trying to expand the conversation with Nika.

However, Nika continued to look at the animal and did not respond to Kathryn's question.

"Nika?" Kathryn asked after a while, in which Nika still had not answered.

Then Nika glared at her annoyed. "Do not involve me in irrelevant conversations." She hissed softly, then stood up and walked away into the cave.

Kathryn sighed heavily and looked after her.

After Nika was gone and looked like she was not going to return, Kathryn put out the fire, with the water in a bucket beside the campfire. Quietly she slipped into the cave. To their surprise, the lights were still burning and Nika was still awake and sitting at the table writing something in a book.

Kathryn stepped closer to her.

"I'm sorry, I did not mean to upset you. Should I sleep outside?" Kathryn asked carefully.

But Nika just shook her head. Relieved Kathryn then took her backpack and prepared her night camp. After she had laid out her sleeping mat and put her sleeping bag on it, she crawled inside, fully clothed.

As soon as her head touched the pillow of the sleeping bag and she had closed her eyes, she had fallen asleep from all the efforts of the day.

When Nika noticed the even breathing of Kathryn, she put out three of a total of five oil-powered lamps and withdrew herself. Lucky for her, "P-One of One" - P1 for short, as she called the big cat, had already made herself comfortable in her bed. Nika liked to sleep with P1 in her bed. It reminded her of her stuffed animal, which she had as a child for a short time. Only the P1 was nice and warm and purred soothing.


	13. Chapter 13

**6 months later**

Personal logbook Kathryn Janeway:

Meanwhile I live for 6 months in a cave with Nika and her cougar together. The forest is slowly beginning to change more and more. The green leaves of different trees begin to discolor. From green to yellow, red, brown and also colorful. Soon they will cover the forest floor and leave the branches of the trees empty.

And Nika? Most of the time she tries to keep up the image of a cold Borg, but in the past few months, I have often had moments with her that clearly prove she is not.

Nika really does not make it easy for me to approach her. She has built such a high and thick wall around herself that one would need a huge arsenal of weapons to tear down that wall.

I adhere to their rules, there are only two that are really important to her. On the one hand no irrelevant conversations and on the other hand no touches of any kind. Most of the time I find it easy to follow these rules, but there are days and even nights when I find it very difficult. Especially in the nights when I hear her cry or when she has a nightmare.

Once, it was the first week, I went to bed at her and laid my arm soothingly and comfortingly around her body after I was startled out of sleep, as Nika crying out for help in her sleep and having a bad nightmare. The next morning when I woke up, Nika and her cougar had disappeared. I thought she had set off, as she had done in the past few days, to check her traps, collect firewood for the fire or harvest berries and fruits. I was wrong. Nika stayed away for three damn days and nights and I was terribly worried and terribly reproached. I searched for them in the forest, of course I had to stay near the cave because I did not know the surroundings so well. But after every day I looked for her and did not find her, a night awaited me that dragged on long, in which I could not sleep with worry. When I was completely desperate on the fourth day and was already thinking about how to find her, in this huge forest, she suddenly stood before me again. Her puma immediately went into his basket and napped while Nika walked past me into the cave. Without looking at me or giving me an explanation where she was. But I got her silent message that she gave me with a quick glance * Touch me and I'm gone, for a few days or forever, pick it out. * Since then, I follow this rule, although I often find it very difficult, if she has a nightmare or is in a depressive phase and crawls into her bed, wants to eat nothing and does not talk to me.

Sometimes I just want to grab her by the shoulders and shake her until she's dismissing that damned Borg behavior and starting to become a normal-thinking and feeling person. But before I let myself be tempted, remember that nothing is her fault, but mine, because I did not save her then.

It sometimes happens that she disappears for a few days without leaving any messages or giving notice. Every time I'm worried if she comes back or disappeared forever in this huge forest. If she leaves her puma with me, I can at least be sure that she will return. But when she take him with her, not then. Every time I am infinitely happy when she reappears. Telling her how I feel, that I was worried about her, does not help. She just looks at me blankly and goes away without talking to me.

So I've gotten used to being awake in front of her, so I can accompany her as often as possible into the forest.

Contrary to my assumption that Nika checks her traps most of the time, she rarely does so. Only every three days. The rest of the time she is looking for a variety of things to explore. Meanwhile, she has the most varied grasses, mushrooms, berries, fruits, animals, whether small or large, examined. As a Borg she proceeds logically step by step. It's like assimilation, except that she keeps her assimilation tubes with her.  
At any rate, she always puts something in her mouth during her fact-finding missions, chewing on grasses, leaves, mushrooms and other things until it has turned into a mush. If it is too bitter or inedible, she spits the porridge out and we go on. However, if the porridge is pleasant, she also gives me something of what she put in her mouth, and I also have to chew on it. Then she looks at me closely and quietly demands my opinion. Can I classify the porridge as edible in my mouth, I nod her and she grabs more of the leaves, grasses, herbs or tubers and takes them to the cave.

There she kept a close record of everything she has rediscovered, what we've found, where we've been, where things are growing, and so on.

Especially insects, beetles and critters have done to her. Each new copy is packed in a small container and taken away. In the cave, it is then observed by her for many hours and examined closely.

She experimented with the grasses, leaves, mosses and flowers until she made drinkable teas, ointments and creams. With the berries, fruits, tubers, and mushrooms she tried to prepare the various dishes. She writes down exactly which ingredients she used in which amount and how long she cooks or fries this or that.

Once I looked at her notebooks, which she had already written in this way, but to my disappointment everything was written in a foreign language that I could not decipher. Only on the basis of the drawings I could get an idea of what exactly was going on.

As for my life here in the wild, I must confess that it is harder than I had supposed. I've never been a person who likes to camp in the woods, let alone live. To be honest, I sometimes wonder if I should really stay here with Nika or go back to my A zone.

To be completely honest with myself, I am sure Nika would be very happy if I finally left her alone. She has not put me in front of the cave yet, but I bet she would, if she knew how to, celebrate a party if I left.

But everything in me resists it. I do not want to leave her, I want to be with her. No matter how exhausting it is, how dismissive, cold and uninterested she is in me and my company. I just can not go. But I also know that I certainly do not want to spend my rest of life in the forest. I want so much, especially I want to be close to Nika, talk to her, tell her how much I would like to meet her and how much she means to me. Damn, I just want to be able to build a relationship with her, be her friend, give her comfort when she's sick, make her laugh, share her life instead of living next to her.

I think I will leave if nothing changes and she will not let me in soon. I am tired and exhausted, disappointed with myself and frustrated by the whole situation. I know I will hate myself when I leave Nika, but as how we live together, I also hate myself because as a child I could not save her from the Borg and the Borg queen, and that's why she is the way she is.

Logbook entry end.

****************************

Nika sat down on her bed, closed her eyes, and wrapped herself in her blanket. Her body hurt and she was so tired.

Kathryn, who had washed her and Nikas laundry down by the lake, which was only a few minutes away from the cave, came into the cave a short time later and looked at Nika in surprise. She had not expected that Nika would be back as soon as possible, especially because Nika was planning to check her traps.

"Nika?" She asked worriedly. "Are you all right? Where is your puma?"

Nika opened her eyes and tried to sit up, but her body hurt her so damn she screamed in pain. Kathryn immediately squatted over and gently pushed her back into bed.

"Nika, what happened?" Kathryn asked as she carefully pulled the blanket of Nikas body. To Kathryn's amazement, Nika let herself down and was the more shocked when she saw that her clothes were full of blood and torn.

Kathryn stood up quickly and took a pair of scissors from a shelf and hurried back to Nika. Carefully, she cut open her top and held her breath in horror. Nikas upper body had four huge and obviously very deep scratch marks, starting from the left shoulder, ending over her left breast to her abdominal implant, from which the blood seeped out quickly.

Kathryn was getting sick at the sight, and Nikas pale, pale face and ragged breath just made her nausea even worse. Into her head, her thoughts flipped over and she tried to come up with a plan how best to help Nika.

After checking herself again, Kathryn collected the medical emergency pack and put together a hypospray that would stop the bleeding and protect it from infection. Then Kathryn quickly cleaned the wound with water and then put pieces of moss, which had already helped the injury of the Puma, on the wound. To fix this, Kathryn joined Nikas upper body, which was quite difficult as she had to raise Nika with a gauze bandage. Internally she cursed the wilderness and her helplessness and that the medical emergency pack contained no skin generator. Kathryn hoped that Nikas nanoprobes would heal the wound as fast as possible. But Nika would have had to regenerate more often, which she rarely did, as she hated having to lie motionless on her bed while the generator she had was charging her nanoprobes. From where Nika had the generator and how she had managed to make him here in the wilderness, Kathryn had not yet been able to find out.

As Nikas upper body was reasonably well connected, Kathryn let her gently slide back onto the bed. Only then did she realize that Nika was unconscious, but her breathing had calmed down. Kathryn smoothly brushed aside the hairs that had fallen in Nikas face and put a kiss on her cold forehead.

"Please stay alive." she whispered softly.


	14. Chapter 14

"No." Nika screamed in her feverish imagination, wildly waving her arms in the air. Kathryn, who had fallen asleep exhausted from her bed, startled and immediately got up to calm Nika.

"Shht ... everything is fine. Nobody can hurt you here." Kathryn tried to calm Nika. But Nika kept whirling wildly in the air with her arms and pushed Kathryn away. Kathryn clumsily bumped against the bed frame and groaned in pain.

Despite the hypospray, Nika had had a fever and her wound had become inflamed. Kathryn had been doing Nika's fever for the past two days, using whatever means at her disposal, and lowering the young woman, to calm down when she had bad fever dreams. By now she was at the end of her own strength. Therefore, she sat down on the floor and took her face in her hands and began to cry unrestrained, in pain and also from helplessness.

She could not think of anything more about how to reduce the fever, and even Nikas nano-probes seemed to be of little help in healing. But worst of all were the fever dreams. All too well Kathryn could imagine, everything that tormented Nika in her fever dreams, that had happened to her at some point in her life and now they were haunted again. Her heart ached every time Nika desperately shouted for help, reminding her of when the two Borg drones grabbed Nika from her arms, kidnapped and beamed with her from Voyager.

After allowing herself for a while to let her sorrow go, Kathryn realized that it was suddenly quiet in the cave. She straightened up quickly and looked at Nika. To her relief, Nika had fallen asleep and her breathing was calm. Kathryn sighed in relief and left the cave. She needed fresh air.

Before Kathryn knew, she walked through the forest, moving farther and farther away from the cave and Nika and all the terrible fever dreams. As if out of her mind she fled without realizing it. Only when she stumbled and hit hard on the forest floor, she realized what she had done. With her arm she wiped her tears from her cheeks and scrambled up from the forest floor. Only then did she notice what she had stumbled upon. Before her on the forest floor lay the puma. Nikas Puma. He was as brutal been attacked as Nika and died of his serious injuries.

"Shit, damn it." Kathryn cursed desperately. "I'm spared nothing, right?" She cried out loud in the forest.

With her hand, she stroked gently over the head of the dead cougar. "Oh, I'm so sorry, what made you and Nika so attacked?" She asked quietly, looking at her surroundings uneasily.

Only after a while did she get up with a sigh and walked back through the forest to the cave, where she quickly looked to Nika, who was still lying quietly in her bed. Then she went to one of the shelves and pulled out a tarp. With the tarpaulin she went back into the forest and put the dead cougar on it.

With a lot of pulling and tug, she managed to pull the tarpaulin across the forest back to the cave. Once there, she sat exhausted and tired on the floor and wondered what to do with the dead animal. Burying did not happen because Kathryn did not want to attract scavengers. So it just stayed to burn up.

So she fetched enough firewood, which she layered in the hearth. Then she put the cougar on it. Finally, she lit the fire and watched for a moment as the flames slowly distorted and burned the Puma's body. It was not long before there was no sign of the once proud animal. Dejected and deeply sad, Kathryn went back into the cave and checked Nika again before retiring to her sleeping bag, switching off the lamp next to her sleeping quarters and crying herself to sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

Nika opened her eyes, but it was so dark that she could not even see her own hand in front of her face. She quickly closed her eyes again and immediately opened them again. But it remained dark and black.

Since she could think, she hated the darkness. Whenever it was dark, terrible things had happened before and Mother punished them by locking them into her Borg chamber and deactivating the light so that Nika could not turn on the light on her own.

Slowly, panic crept up in Nika. Terrified, she wanted to straighten up, but a stinging pain that jerked through her entire upper body prevented her from moving on. Where was she? Was she in her Borg Chamber and punished by Mother? What happened? The more feverish Nika tried to remember, the more desperate she became. Without realizing it, she started crying, whimpering and fumbling wildly around, searching for a clue.

Kathryn, who had a light sleep anyway, though she was infinitely tired, immediately jumped. The Wimmer sound chased a shiver down her spine. Hurriedly, she set the oil-powered lamp on she had placed next to her sleeping quarters and crawled out of her sleeping bag. As soon as she saw Nika whimper in her bed and cry, she hurried to her.

Nika was so upset in her grief that she had not noticed how the darkness had been replaced by light in the cave. Kathryn sat down on the bed and laid a reassuring hand on Nika's shoulder, rubbing it gently. Although she expected Nika to push her away. To her surprise, Nika looked at her with tear-stained eyes and blinked in confusion. Then she put her head back in her pillows and whispered a soft "thank you".

Kathryn nodded to her and pulled the covers back over Nikas body and covered them properly.

She was relieved that Nika had not pushed her away and that she seemed to be in better health. With a deep sigh, she got up and turned away from Nika's bed to return to her own sleeping quarters. But suddenly she felt a hand on her arm and she looked a little surprised.

"I ..." Nika said in a hotter and raspy voice before she had to swallow. Kathryn sat back at her bed and put her hand on Nika's forehead to determine her temperature. Delighted, she quickly realized that Nikas forehead was only half as warm as a few hours ago.

"Do you want something to drink?" Kathryn asked and Nika gratefully nodded that Kathryn had guessed what she needed.

Kathryn got up quickly and got a glass of water, then sat back down to Nika and slipped her hand under Nikas head and helped lift her. Greedy, she put her lips to the glass and wanted to drink as much as possible at once.

"Not so fast, take smaller sips, that's better." Kathryn instructed gently and Nika obeyed. When Nika drank enough, Kathryn set the glass aside.

"Please ... light." Nika whispered softly and Kathryn looked at her in confusion.

"What?" She asked worriedly.

"Please, let it on." Nika answered softly.

Kathryn, who had noticed for a few days now that the oil ran out of oil, had spent the last few days since she had taken care of Nika the oil of four lamps in a lamp and turned it off at night to save oil. She had always wondered, since she was here with Nika, why Nika had at least two lights on, even at night. She had assumed all along that it was due to the nightmares of Nika. 

"Please," Nika pleaded more desperately, and Kathryn's heart contracted painfully.

"Sure, I'll turn on the lamp. I'll put it in front of you bed, okay? "Kathryn asked, picking up the lamp.

Nika nodded thankfully and closed her eyes in relief. Kathryn sighed softly and resolved to speak as soon as possible with Nika about her discovery that her oil was empty soon.


	16. Chapter 16

The next morning, Kathryn looked first to Nika, but as she was still asleep, she wanted to run down to the lake to wash and prepare for the day.

When she returned, she was already expecting Nika, who lay awake in her bed.

Kathryn stepped to Nika's bed and put her hand on her forehead to measure her temperature. Nikas forehead was much cooler than in the days before. Satisfied, Kathryn smiled at Nika.

"How are you?" Kathryn asked.

Nika tried to sit up, but her upper body ached too much, so she gave up quickly.

"I'm in pain." she answered honestly.

"Yes, I can imagine. I should renew your bandage. The last few days you were in a delirium with fever, so you did not consciously notice this part. But now the fever seems to have subsided. May I?" Kathryn asked, worried that Nika would push her away.

But Nika nodded to her and Kathryn sighed with relief.

"Well, I'll just get new clean water out of the lake and everything else I need. I'll be right back." Kathryn said and hurried out of the cave.

"Where is P1?" Nika asked after Kathryn returned.

Kathryn sat down next to Nika and looked at her sadly. "He is dead."

Nika swallowed hard and looked at Kathryn irritated. "No" she said desperately and wiped angrily the tears that had come from her eyes and looked sheepishly to one side.

Kathryn put her hand on Nika's hand.

"It's okay, you can cry, you loved the puma." she said softly.

Nika pulled her hand away from Kathryn's hand and glared at her.

"I am Borg. Borg love nothing and nobody. These are irrelevant feelings. They are pathetic and bad. I'm Borg." Nika said hard.

Kathryn shook her head.

"These are the words of your mother. I know that you loved him and I know that it hurts you, that he is dead now. It is not pitiful to let go of your grief and grief, and it does not testify to weakness. To deny the pain and to bury it deep within itself is pathetic because one does not face it. You are not like that, you are strong and courageous. Face your pain and grief and do not let yourself be controlled by it. Let it out." Kathryn demanded and Nika looked at her uncertainly.

There were tears in Kathryn's eyes, running down her cheeks. It hurt her heart to see Nika so full of uncertainty and grief.

"Do you think I'm pathetic because I'm crying?" Kathryn asked in a shaky voice.

"You are a human being. I'm Borg." Nika replied logically and soberly.

"No, damn it!" Kathryn put her hands on Nika's shoulders and looked deep into her eyes.

"You are a human, not a Borg. You have feelings, let them out. Please Nika, choose Humankind and against the Borg." Kathryn said desperately, tears still running down her cheek.

"I can not!" Came the soft reply from Nika.

"Why not?"

"Because I ..." Nika could not say it, it was too painful to say it out loud. Kathryn looked at her and recognized the truth.

"Yes you can. You are Nika, who led her Borg fleet out of the Borg territory. You were brave and strong enough to do that. You have released five million Borg drones and given back their individuality. You can do that. Please Nika, decide for humanity, for yourself, for me. For a future. I love you, start loving yourself. You are a wonderful person, your heart is good and gentle. Love, live and enjoy life. Do not hide in this cave in nowhere. Please!" Begged Kathryn Nika desperately.

"I can not!" Whispered Nika and her tears ran down her cheeks softly and quietly.

Kathryn pulled Nika into her arms and hugged her tight.

"I know. I'm here, I'm here for you. I'll help you."

Nika also wrapped her arms around Kathryn's upper body and clung to her.

Both women cried together for all the things they had lost, experienced and coped with over the past 26 years. They held on for a very long time.

Then Nika broke away from Kathryn and wiped her tears. "I am Nika!" She replied clearly, without doubt or uncertainty.

Kathryn then smiled broadly at her. "Yes, that's you. Can I change your bandage now?"

Nika nodded her head and Kathryn began to release the bandage. For a while both were silent, each lost in their own thoughts.

"I injected him with nano-probes."

Kathryn looked up and Nika. "What?"

"You asked me how P1 got so tame." Nika answered and new tears ran down her cheeks.

Kathryn looked at her stunned. "Why?" She just brought out.

Nika took a deep breath before answering. "It was my fault he got hurt. When I found him, he struggled for his life. I should have killed him, but I could not do it. So I injected him with some of my nano probes to heal him. The nanoprobes embossed him on me. So he was tame." Nika answered softly.

"You saved his life." Kathryn said firmly, removing the bandage and looking at the four long scratch marks. Compared to yesterday, they looked much better, but still bad. Kathryn took the washcloth and dipped it in the cold water, which had taken her out of the lake. Then she carefully stroked it over Nikas upper body.

Nika immediately stiffened and blew the air she had stopped, out of her mouth. "Uff"

"I'm sorry, but it has to be." Kathryn apologized and continued to clean the wounds. Then she rubbed one of Nikas salves on top of it and put more pieces of moss over it before she tied the bandage around Nikas upper body again.

"Who made you and your puma attacked?" Kathryn asked, who had been worried about it for a while. Nika, who was very quiet and withdrawn the whole time during the bandage change, looked at her.

"A bear, I think." she said softly as Kathryn finished her work and pulled the covers over Nikas body again.

"I had thought something similar. I did not know that there are such dangerous animals here. You should not go out alone anymore. That's too dangerous." Kathryn replied and looked at Nika pleadingly.

"I ..." Nika started, but was interrupted by Kathryn.

"Please, I'm serious. Do not go alone into the forest as long as the bear is still hanging around here. And please do not go away for days without knowing where you've gone and if you're coming back." Kathryn asked and Nika nodded her head. "Okay" she said quietly, though she did not really look like she understood what Kathryn was asking her to do.

"Good." Kathryn said calmly. "That reminds me, the lamp oil is almost used up. So we'll be in the dark in a few days. Maybe we should go back to the zones and get new ones?" Kathryn asked casually, hoping that Nika would find the idea great and maybe, once they were back in the zones, they would stay there.

"I had two bottles of lamp oil in my backpack. What happened to it?" Nika asked in surprise and Kathryn winked at her in surprise.

"I did not know that you have lamp oil in your backpack, I'll go and get it right away. Where did you get it from?" Kathryn asked curiously, but Nika had already closed her eyes and seemed to have fallen asleep.

Kathryn sighed deeply and took Nikas backpack, which had been leaning on the shelf for days. In fact, she found in it the oil needed to fill the lamps. "Shit, how did she get that?" Kathryn wondered. Their hope to return to the zones, was gone. The oil would last for several weeks and then they would probably be stuck here in the dead of winter, starving and freezing to death. No nice view, Kathryn thought. Sighing deeply, she sat down on her Sleeping bag and began to think about how best to discuss the matter with Nika in order to convince her.


	17. Chapter 17

**3 weeks later**

Personal logbook Kathryn Janeway:

Nika is finally getting better. During the time I took care of her, we came a little closer. At first she hated it when I had to change her bandage and touched her. The first few times she stiffened a lot and made it impossible for me to put on the bandage properly. But now she can relax and I can get better the bandage fix.

I even managed to enforce some rules on Nika. One of my rules, even makes me crazy now, but Nika seems to have a lot of fun. I persuaded Nika that she and I would communicate with each other for at least 20 minutes a day. In return, I promised that I would bless them with silence throughout the day.

Now Nika tells me about 10 minutes every day what she knows about her bugs, insects and snails. Especially the bees and ants did it to their liking. I have no idea why she is so fixated on this topic. In my 10 minutes, which are available to me, I try to introduce them to normal conversation topics. But all in all, I have the impression that she is shutting down rather than really listening as I speak. But whether she does or not, I'm allowed to sit beside her on the bed, communicate with her, and at that time, it feels like we're slowly getting closer.

Logbook entry end.

******************

"Snails are very tender animals that have to compete in a very short-lived and fast-paced world. They only have their little house to protect themselves against enemies - and their slime. Snails can effectively repair their cottage with it if it has been damaged. Likewise, they can smoothly glide over hard, sharp or edged paths. It is even possible for these animals to walk over sharp blades without injury. The secret behind these skills is their slime. He protects and repairs. In addition, he is antibaktieriell. With this, the snail arrives against diseases. For several hundred million years, the snail successfully denies her life. Here is a brief overview of valuable ingredients of snail slime. On the one hand there are allantoin, it regenerates damaged tissue and supports its reconstruction. Allantoin also stimulates cell regeneration. It is commonly used to treat, for example, injuries and even minor burns and is known to be gentle. Collagen, that's how the slug fixes her house, if ..." Nika was full in her element as she told about slime from slug.

"Nika?" Kathryn asked, interrupting her speech.

Nika looked irritated at Kathryn, knowing she had at least 4 minutes to talk about the mucus and its miracle healing powers. Kathryn had never interrupted her during her talk time.

"Yes?" Nika asked wondering.

"We have to talk about our supplies being used up and we will not have food in two or three days. Winter is coming. We need to get back to the zones." Kathryn replied decisively and Nika looked at her speechless, then swallowed, twice before answering.

"I will not go back to the zones, but you are free to return any time." Nika answered blankly.

Kathryn blinked at her. "I will not go without you. How do you want to survive here alone without food, without company and without warmth?" Kathryn asked her in a tone that she once had, when she was still a Captain of Starfleet.

Nika shook her head then looked up to the cave ceiling.

"I am Borg. I can survive alone, I do not need food, no company and no warmth. My exoskeleton also protects me from the cold and all other dangers." Nika replied clearly irritable.

"I thought we had that with the *I'm Borg, I love nothing and no one and I do not need anyone* Thing left behind us." Kathryn replied softly.

Nika glared at Kathryn.

"No, we do not have, because it's my thing and I will not give it up. Why are you still here? Why do not you just go and leave me alone? How long do you want to make something out of me that I am be not? What do you want from me?" Nika asked angrily.

In Kathryn's eyes came tears immediately, which she held back with all her might.

"I'm worried about you and I want to help you." Kathryn confessed. "If I had not been here when the bear attacked you, what would happen to you?" She asked.

But Nika shrugged her shoulders. "I would either have died or beamed to my Borg cube to regenerate myself there." Nika explained quickly, before she realized that she had just blabbed too much.

Kathryn looked speechless. "What?" She asked, having regained her composure.

Nika stretched out her arm towards Kathryn and pointed her other hand at an implant.

"If I click here, I can beam to my Borg cube. What do you think, how I brought all these things here or how I could survive so long without regenerating myself?" Asked Nika Kathryn seriously.

Kathryn stared long at Nika. Of course, that explained everything. From where Nika could get all the containers, tools, generator here. Where did she get the lamp oil and the different foods that you just could not make in the wild.

"Was that why you disappeared again and again for a few days, because you have returned to your cube to regenerate yourself?" Kathryn asked, after all this had become clear.

Nika nodded her head and looked down at her hands in embarrassment.

"Yes, I've tried to survive without regeneration, but my body only lasts for a maximum of three to four weeks without regeneration." Nika confessed, embarrassed by her weakness.

"Why did not you tell me about it? Why do you not conceal from me that you always had the opportunity to return to civilization?" Kathryn asked seriously.

"Because it was none of your business. You came here and did not want to leave. You have meddled in my life and want to change me since you are here. You want to make something out of me that I am not. You force me on your company and irrelevant conversations." Nika hissed contemptuously at Kathryn and tried to get out of bed. But since she was still weak and she still had pain in her upper body, she gave it up and let her annoyed sink back into her bed.

Kathryn, on the other hand, stood up and hastily collected her possessions. She clearly had enough. If Nika really believed that she did not need anyone and could survive the winter alone, then she should do it. Kathryn, however, decided to leave. Nika did not want her here so it was best to leave. No matter how much she hated herself for leaving Nika alone, the certainty that Nika could beam back to her Borg cube at any time gave her the strength to leave now. Maybe someday she could let go and build a future without the horrors of the past.

Nika watched in amazement as Kathryn searched for her things and packed them in her backpack. She honestly did not think Kathryn would go. But now that she was watching her seize her, she felt a strange feeling she had never experienced before. Not knowing what it was, she pushed her aside and continued to watch Kathryn unemotionally.

"Please beam me to your cube, from there, I'll be fine on my own." Kathryn asked after she was ready for departure.

Nika nodded to her and pushed carefully out of bed. "We have to go outside the cave, it's not going in here." Nika replied and Kathryn immediately jumped to her side to help her get up.

But Nika pushed her aside. "I can do it alone." she said irritably. Kathryn bit her lower lip and left the cave.

After Nika struggled out of the cave with a pained face, she took Kathryn's hand and clicked on her implant. Within a few seconds, both women materialized into a greenish lit cube. As soon as they arrived, Nika released Kathryn's arm and clicked on her implant, beaming away a moment later.

Kathryn looked at the empty spot next to her and her heart tightened convulsively. Tears came into her eyes immediately, which she wiped furiously with her sleeve.

"Shit" Kathryn yelled, desperate and hurt, into the empty Borg cube. That was not how she had imagined it. She would have liked to say goodbye to Nika, to hug her again and admonish her to take care of herself. And maybe she could have persuaded Nika to stay here in the zone.

"Damn Nika!"


	18. Chapter 18

As soon as Nika was back in her cave, she looked around uncertainly. Now that she was alone again, she would have to feel better. But instead she felt terribly alone and lonely. The unfamiliar feeling she had already grabbed and what she had successfully pushed aside flooded her body and crushed her. Tears came into her eyes immediately and she began to cry silently. To ease the pain she had felt, she quickly climbed into her bed and wrapped herself in her blanket.

**********************

Meanwhile, Kathryn looked around the room where she had been beamed with Nika just a few minutes ago and was now left alone. The Borg Chamber looked very much like her Borg Chamber, where she was initially held prisoner. But she also realized that it was not her Borg chamber, but Nikas.

It was just as dull in Nikas Borg chamber as in hers, with the difference that Nika had lived here for 26 years. "Shit" Kathryn blurted out, how could a child of seven have lived in such a dreary Borg chamber all these years? Everywhere she looked, there were only gray walls, an uncomfortable bed, an alcove in the corner, and a simple dresser with many drawers. Not more.

Kathryn quickly went to it and opened the drawers in a row, but all were empty. "Strange" Kathryn went through. "But maybe Nika had taken the contents into the cave as well." Kathryn muttered as she tried to close the last drawer. But since something was interrupt, she had to try it several times. After all this failed, she simply pulled out the drawer and took a closer look. To her astonishment, something was glued to the bottom of the drawer. Kathryn removed it immediately and looked closely at it. It looked a bit like a key, but what was it for?

Kathryn looked around the Borg Chamber again, but could not find anything to push the key in. Following an idea, she pushed the dresser from the gray wall and finally found what she was looking for.

She quickly pushed the bowl into the small hole and turned it over. A small hatch opened and Kathryn looked inside. There were many things hidden in the hatch. Carefully, Kathryn pulled one out.

To their surprise, it was a scrape of cloth. With her fingers, she smoothed this and realized that he had been painted. A child's drawing, a bit scrawny and faded, could be seen on it. On closer inspection, Kathryn could see a man on the drawing, but his limbs were separated from his body and his eyes were clearly scary. Behind the man lying on the ground, another person was painted. It looked like a girl.

Kathryn's heart contracted painfully. "Was that Nika? What was the matter with the drawing?"

Kathryn put aside the rags and pulled something else out of the hatch. It was a data padd. Quickly she turned it on. On the screen appeared the small face of Nika. Her Nika, so small and fragile. Nika had cried, Kathryn could see that clearly. Kathryn clicked the padd again and the logbook entry started to run.

"I want to go home, I do not want to stay here any longer. Please!" Nika desperately pleaded and cried, then the entry ended.

Kathryn clicked on the next entry.

"There are other children here, I have searched and found them. But I can not play with them. They are in ripening chambers and swimming in a green liquid. I visit them every day and tell them what I have seen and experienced here. But mother must not know it, otherwise she will get angry with me and she will lock me into my Borg chamber as a punishment and deactivate the light. I'm so scared in the dark." Nika said in a whisper and looked around uncertainly as she finished the logbook entry.

Kathryn hesitantly put her finger on the data pad button, unsure if she wanted to see more entries from Nika. The two entries she had seen so far had already taken her severely. What else would she see? With bitten lips and serious expression, she clicked the button.

At the next entry, Nika smiled at Kathryn as she narrated with joy.

"Kenny has climbed out of the maturation chamber and he became a working drone. I visited him at his workstation. He seems to like working there. I have watched him closely, which individual steps he has to perform. I asked him a lot. Kenny does not answer me. Drones answer or never talk to me. I am like air to them. But Kenny is different. I've known him for several weeks now and I'm sure he listens to me when I tell him something. I can well imagine what he would answer if he could. I will always visit Kenny from now on."

Kathryn put her hand over her mouth, suppressing a sob that was about to break out of her. How lonely Nika must have been, that she followed a drone every day anew and tried to communicate with her.

"Mother ... destroyed Kenny ... He was ... torn apart. His eyes ... looked at me ... and his mouth was in pain ... torn open. It's ... it's ... my fault. It's always ... my fault." Nika said in her next logbook entry.

Kathryn started to cry and watched helplessly as Nika tried desperately to understand and cope with the loss of her boyfriend while she kept trying to suppress her crying and to be strong.

Kathryn clicked on the next entry, although she did not want to, she needed to know what happened next.

"I found a stuffed animal in an assimilation room. It's called Bunny and he was my best friend. But mother found him and destroyed him. Mother says that human emotions and needs are contemptuous. That they poison my spirit and make me weak. She says I'm Borg and I have to behave like a Borg and leave everything behind, making me weak and pathetic. I am Borg. I am Borg. Borg ... "

Kathryn desperately blinked her tears as she saw this entry. Nikas small face was serious and you could still see the dried tears on her face. But she looked incredibly composed, her eyes looking blank as she kept repeating that she was Borg.

The Borg queen had broken Nika within a few months, leaving only an empty shell of a child, which was supposed to be loved and cared for, instead of being isolated, lonely and abandoned, growing up on a Borg cube with 129,000 drones, and a pawn in her vengeance by the Borg queen to use against Kathryn.

Kathryn clicked through all the log entries, but the older Nika became, the greater her hatred of Kathryn seemed to have grown.

Kathryn collapsed sobbing on Nikas former bed. Kathryn could well understand that Nika had learned to hate her more and more as she grew older. But when they lived together in the cave, she did not have the impression that Nika still hated her. Okay, she did not enjoy her company, but she had tolerated her.

And what had she done? She came and disturbed Nika in her den and in her new lives, inviting her to change, to no longer hide behind her Borg facade and accept her humanity. How stupid she had been. She had thought she knew what Nika had gone through, but she had not known. And now she had let Nika down again. How terrible she was. No wonder Nika was glad when she wanted to return to the zones and not say goodbye to her.

Kathryn wiped her tears and got up from Nika's bed. A little more confidently she went back to Luke and put back the data padd and the scraps of cloth and ignored the other contents. Kathryn did not want to know more about what kept Nika hiding in her secret hatch. Then she shouldered her backpack and left Nikas Borgkammer and went out into the hallway. As soon as she left the Borg cube, she wanted to return to the A Zone. Kathryn made up her mind.

"Hello?" Terrified and surprised, Kathryn jumped and looked around. In front of her stood the woman who had looked after her a few months ago when Nika had held her captive. Kathryn had always wondered where this woman had stayed after meeting Nika. Kathryn had never asked.

"Hello." Kathryn said softly and looked at the woman curiously.


	19. Chapter 19

"I'm looking for Nika and I'm sure you know where she is." the woman said and put on a friendly smile.

"Nika, is not here and I do not think she wants to see anyone." Kathryn answered gravely.

"So you know where she is?"

"Yes I know that. But as I said, I'm pretty sure Nika would not want to see anyone. I'm sorry, I have to go. Goodbye." Kathryn said and went down the hall.

"I'm sure Nika would like to see me. So it would be very nice of you to tell me where to find it." cried she Kathryn after.

Kathryn turned around and looked at her closely.

"I'm Nika's friend. I can understand that you do not want to tell me where she is, but it's important. Please tell me where to find her." the woman replied and Kathryn blinked at her irritated.

"You are her friend? Where were you the last months, the last year?" Kathryn asked.

The woman walked up to Kathryn and handed her her hand. "I am Amira and Nika had sent me on a mission. I've just come back recently and I'm sure she really wants to know how the mission went. Please, where is she?"

"She's in the mountains and living in a cave, if you wait here, you could meet her here in a few days, or a maximum of 3-4 weeks, if she beams here to regenerate." Kathryn explained and turned around again to go to.

"Please do not go, I do not have time to wait. Please, if you know where Nika is, please take me to her. It is really important. It's about the Borg Queen and her Borg fleet." Amira replied, looking pleadingly at Kathryn.

Kathryn did not want to go back to Nika, she did not want to cause Nika any more pain. But when it came to the Borg queen, it might have been urgent that Amira had to go to Nika.

"Does the Supreme Council already know?" Kathryn asked hopefully, to be able to talk herself out.

Amira shook her head. "No, I know only Nika, no one else. I've got a small shuttle, so we could get to Nika quickly and you can be where you want to go faster. How far away is the place where Nika is staying?"

"About 10 days on foot." Kathryn replied hesitantly. "But I really do not want to come along. I can record a card for you." She suggested, but Amira shook her head and stepped closer to Kathryn.

"As I said, I do not have time. Nika must know what I know. And therefore it is necessary that you absolutely accompany me. I think we can do it in 2-3 days with the shuttle. Come on." Amira called Kathryn and took her arm in her hand.

Suddenly Kathryn did not feel well. Amira's grip was firm, with no contradictions.

*******************

Amira flew non-stop for two days the shuttle through the landscape of the planet, by day and by night. Kathryn had questioned her a bit and found out that she was a cyborg and knew Nika for a very long time. What she did not realize, however, was why she was in such a hurry to get to Nika.

Kathryn gained more and more the impression that there was more going on than Amira had told her. If the Borg Queen were truly on their way to their planet, it would make more sense to inform the Supreme Council so that at least 100 functioning Borgkubes, about 4 million former Borg drones, and a protective grille could stop the Borg queen. But what should Nika do against the Borg queen? Should she make the decisions and reintroduce her Borg fleet?

*******************

"From here we have to walk." Kathryn Amira explained as they arrived at the large forest. Amira looked at Kathryn skeptically.

"How far is it?" She asked.

"Oh, just a few hours and we're at the cave. We should stay here tonight and start tomorrow morning." Kathryn said, hoping that Amira would agree.

"Okay." Amira agreed and got out of the shuttle and looked into the dark forest. Only a few hours left and Amira was finally able to complete her assignment and then she would finally be free. Amira cheered inwardly and already figured out what she would do as soon as she was free.

Kathryn, on the other hand, lay down a little more comfortably in her seat and tried to sleep. But whenever she closed her eyes, Nika came to her mind. The little Nika, who desperately asked in her data padd to leave the Borg. The grown-up Nika, who had been attacked by a bear and lay pale in her bed, fighting for her life in feverish dreams. Nika, who cuddled and wrestled with her cougar. Nika, Nika again and again.

How could Kathryn have believed that she could leave Nika without having to think about her? How stupid she was. She would always have to think about Nika, wondering how she was, where she was, what she was doing, and whether she was happy. She had been thinking of Nika for 26 years. It was the only thing that was important in their lives. How could she have stopped now? How could she have left Nika?

*******************

The next morning, both women set off to walk to Nikas cave. Kathryn was terribly tired because she could barely sleep. But Amira was not interested in that much. The only thing she wanted was to get to Nika as fast as possible, so she drove Kathryn all morning to hurry, so they could move faster.

Full of impatience, Amira ran after Kathryn and did not really pay attention to the surroundings. She was astonished when suddenly she was thrown off the ground and swung into a net across the forest floor.

Kathryn had deliberately led Amira into the trap where she herself was once trapped. Kathryn was scary to Amira and she really wanted to prevent her from getting too close to Nika. Therefore, Kathryn ran quickly through the forest, hoping that she had enough protrusion to shake off Amira.

Back then Nika had led her through the forest for hours until they came to the cave in the evening. But actually it was from the trap where Amira was now trapped, only a few miles away to the cave. It was not until Kathryn accompanied Nika several times into the forest to check the traps did she realize that they had been running several times the first day while Nika checked her traps.

But now Kathryn headed purposefully towards the cave and managed within a hour to arrive there completely out of breath. Quickly she crawled into the cave and was surprised how dark it was inside. The bush was not in front of the cave, so that meant Nika was in the cave. But why were all lights off? Kathryn quickly looked for one of the oil lamps and turned it on. Then she shined the cave. In the corner she found what she was looking for. Hurriedly she ran to Nika and knelt beside her.

Nika wore only an undershirt and a panty and her whole body trembled uncontrollably with cold. Her knees had pulled her close, her arms resting on them and her head hidden on them.

"Nika?" Kathryn asked cautiously, stroking Nikas arm, but Nika's body shield was on and Kathryn abruptly pulled her hand away as she hurt herself.

Nika did not respond.

"Nika, it's me, Kathryn. Please deactivate your body shield. We have to get out of here. Amira is traveling here and I think it's better to leave before she gets here. Nika please!" Kathryn tried to get through to Nika, but Nika remained motionless.

"Nika!" Kathryn called loudly, hoping that Nika had fallen asleep and would wake up now.

"She wants to kill me." Nika whispered in a soft broken voice.

"What?" Kathryn asked, startled. "Nika, we have to get out of here. Please deactivate your body shield. Let's beam into your Borg cube and let the Supreme Council know."

Nika raised her head and looked at Kathryn with a tear-stained face. "You came back ..." she murmured softly. "How so?"

"Amira has forced me, so to speak, to bring her to you. I did not want it, but she did forced me. And on the way here, I got to know her a little better and I have a terrible feeling in her vicinity. Nika, please come, let's get out of here as long as Amira is not here yet." Kathryn asked again. But Nika shook her head.

"I can not ... I'm tired ... I do not want anymore ... I ... I ..." Nika stopped and tears ran down her cheeks and her tremors increased. "I'm dying ... my nano probes ... are too weak." she mumbled softly, letting her head hang again.

Kathryn looked at her in horror. "No." she called determined and commanded in Captain mode. "Listen to me. Disable the body shield! Nika, Comply!" Kathryn ordered.

Nika raised her head in astonishment and looked at Kathryn, then she began to hum a song.

"I hear this song over and over since you left. Do you know it?" Nika asked instead, humming the song on.

Kathryn swallowed several times before answering. "Yes I know it. I've always hummed that to you when you woke up crying as a child from a nightmare."

Nika deactivated her body shield and Kathryn crawled close to her. Nika lay powerless and completely exhausted, her head in Kathryn's lap.

"Please humm it for me." Nika asked softly and Kathryn could no longer hold back her tears. Carefully, she put her arms around Nika's upper body and held her tight as she began to hum the song of back then for Nika.

When she was done with the song, she looked down at Nika. "Why did you sit in the dark, half naked in the corner?" She asked softly.

Nika opened her eyes and looked at Kathryn.

"When I woke up, everything was dark around me. I crawled out of bed and looked for the oil lamp. I did not find her, though." Nika answered in a shaky voice and more tears ran down her cheeks. Kathryn wiped her gently with her fingers.

"You are very cold, you should have gone back to bed and needed to warm yourself. And then think about where the oil lamp is, so you can find it." Kathryn explained softly.

"I ... I ... had ... I was scared." Nika confessed her weakness to someone else for the first time.

"I know honey." Kathryn said softly, stroking Nikas hair and looking at her gently. "I'll get you to wear now and then we beam away here as long as Amira is not here yet. Okay?" Kathryn asked, but Nika had closed her eyes again and was too tired to answer her. Kathryn got up cautiously and put Nika´s body where she'd been sitting. She hurriedly picked up Nika's clothes.

"Nika, I need your help!" Kathryn asked when she turned back to her.

Carefully she pulled Nika first a thick sweater over the head and her threaded her weak arms in the sleeves. With the pants she had more difficulties, as Nika had still pulled her knees against her body. She carefully removed one leg from that position and pushed it into the trouser leg and then the other. However, she had to get up to pull up Nika's pants. So Kathryn put Nika left arm around her shoulders and tried to get up with Nika. Which was quite difficult as Nikas Borg implants made her whole body heavier than he actually looked. After several attempts, Kathryn knew where she took her strength from, she did not know herself. Maybe it was her fear of Amira and what she was up to with Nika, who released enough energy in her to raise Nika.

As soon as Kathryn stood with Nika, which half hung limp and powerless in her arm, Kathryn pulled Nikas pants as best she could. Then she set Nika on the bedstead and leaned her against the wall. While she got her jacket, which hung over the chair.

"Hello, by the way that was not nice to lure me into a trap!" Amira explained as she stepped out of the shadows of the cave entrance and walked purposefully toward Nika.

Kathryn stepped in front of her, but Amira pushed her aside.

Amira took Nika in her arms and straightened her. "Hello dear." she said softly and breathed a peck on Nikas cheek.

"I missed you." she said softly. Kathryn watched in shock as Amira lifted Nika into her arms and slowly left the cave with her. Nika hung limp in her arms, her head and arms, and her legs hung down. As far as Kathryn could tell, Nika was not even conscious.

Before she went out, she turned to Kathryn. "You should come."

Kathryn blinked at her and then walked unsteadily behind Amira.

"What are you going to do with her?" She asked anxiously.

"I will kill her and you will see it. That's my job." Amira replied expressionless.

"But ... but Nika is already dying, her nano probes are already turning off slowly. Why do not you just leave them alone?" Kathryn screamed desperately at Amira.

"I want to be free." Amira said and left the cave. Kathryn hurried after her quickly.

No sooner had Amira emerged from the cave with Nika in her arms, she was blinded by the last autumn sunbeams. For a brief moment she stumbled, over a tree root that had lifted out of the earth. Kathryn herself was at the beginning constantly tripped over it. But then she got used to it and always avoided her.

Kathryn stepped quickly to Amira's side so as to help her not hit the forest floor with Nika. But Amira pushed her aside and did not want to be helped.

Kathryn therefore stumbled backwards and landed her butt on the forest floor. As she tried to get up, something unexpected happened. With wide eyes she saw a bear storming on Amira and rushing at her. Amira dropped Nika in shock and the bear dragged Amira several meters with her.

Kathryn crawled quickly to Nika and pulled her protectively into her arms.

Amira screamed as the bear struck her body with his big paws and mangled her. For a brief moment, they both fought each other while Amira tried to push the bear away and kill him.

But all of a sudden her screams stopped and only the bear's grunt, still raging, could be heard. Kathryn looked shocked to Amira and the bear, when suddenly a powerful explosion tore the bear and Amira in thousands of shreds and tore a huge crater into the forest floor.

Kathryn blinked her eyes confusedly and looked over at the huge hole where several trees, Amira and the bear, had disappeared.

For a long moment she held her breath until she realized what she had just witnessed. Then she looked down at Nika and realized that Nika was more important as to staring at a hole in the forest floor. Quickly she pushed up Nika's jacket and sweater sleeves and clicked on her implant, which they both beamed back to the Borg cube.

*******************

Once materialized in Nikas Borg chamber, Kathryn heaved Nika into her alcove and activated the regeneration cycle, setting it to a two-week cycle. Then she checked the data the alcove gave her and was relieved to see that Nika´s nano-probes were slowly activating.

Kathryn sat down on Nika's bed and looked at Nika for a long time. Only in that quiet moment, she realized what had happened in the last few minutes and how close she and Nika had escaped death.

How would her life go on as soon as Nika came out of the regeneration?


	20. Chapter 20

As Nika regenerated, Kathryn informed the Supreme Council that Amira had managed to go unnoticed on the planet. The Supreme Council immediately sent three Borg cubes into orbit to reinforce and upgrade the shield grid. A troupe of more liberated people headed to Nikas cave to search for Amira's remains. But there was nothing they found. Instead, they found Nika's Cave, which was buried by a landslide caused by the blast. They were only able to rescue a few things from the cave that brought them to Kathryn in the Borg cube.

Meanwhile, Kathryn was preparing to leave the D Zone and made contact with her friends in the A Zone.

In the months she had lived in the cave with Nika, a lot had happened in each zone. Kathryn was particularly pleased when she found out that of the 5 million liberated who largely wanted to live on the planet and only a small portion, especially the species that were not created to live on an Earth-like planet, had left.

The tent-like accommodations had gradually been replaced by proper dwellings, and small and larger towns gradually emerged in this way. The infrastructure is developing more and more. Of the 120 Borg cubes, 50 Borg cubs have been left intact to defend the planet from enemy attacks and to give the liberated the opportunity to regenerate. There were some scientists working on a simple way to regenerate. Solar cells attached to the clothes were designed to keep the nano-probes energized. Thus, an long regeneration into an alcove would soon be superfluous.

Seventy Borg cubes were gradually dismantled and were now used for the construction of cities, houses, technical facilities, such as the water and power plant and the defense center, which monitored the shield grid in orbit.

*******************************

Kathryn sat nervously on Nika's bed and waited impatiently for the regeneration cycle to end. During those two weeks, she had spent a lot of time watching Nika during her regeneration, thinking about her own future. She had thought about the last few months and decided that it was time to look ahead, instead of letting her life be determined by the past. Kathryn was ready to start a new life in the A Zone, leaving only the farewell to Nika. In the past two weeks, she had had enough time to prepare for it. Now only Nika had to wake up, then she could say goodbye.

A few minutes later, Nika was retrieved from her regeneration and her eyes fluttered open. She looked around in surprise when she saw Kathryn in front of her, she stepped out of her alcove.

"What happened?" She asked curiously.

"Come sit with me. I'll tell you everything that happened after you fainted." Kathryn said her. Nika stepped up to her and sat on her bed a short distance from Kathryn, looking expectantly at Kathryn.

After Kathryn had told her the events, Nika frowned at her.

"Amira is dead?" Nika asked again.

"Good." Nika answered, looking away from Kathryn. "She betrayed me since she came into my life. At first I did not know it, but I found it out gradually. The more she found out the secrets I had, the more she exploited that against me. She has ..." Nika stopped because she did not know how she was supposed to express that, or if she should tell.

Kathryn looked worriedly at Nika. "Tell it to me. What did she do?" Kathryn asked gently.

"She blackmailed me ... a few times ... with the knowledge ..." Nika looked sheepishly at her hands and sighed deeply. "About my secrets." Nika finished her sentence.

Kathryn frowned. "What did she blackmail you with? What did she do?"

Nika got up and turned away from Kathryn and went into a corner, in her Borg chamber and looked at the gray wall.

"She touched me, though I did not want it. More than once, she forced me to do some things before I resisted." Nika confessed softly, and Kathryn held her breath and put her hand over her mouth, swearing with fear of rage and anger.

* Was not it enough that Nika had to grow up with the Borg? Why did Amira have to come and harass Nika? Oh my god, damn! * Kathryn thought.

"I was lonely and felt alone. The drones ignored me since I could think, Mother always just called me to check or punish me. I did not have anyone to talk to, I did not talk to anyone verbally for over 10 years, only mentally in Hive consciousness. And then Amira came and she was authorized by Mother to keep me company and to be my friend. At first I did not want all that. I was not used to being with someone who consciously took notice of me and spent time with me. But the longer she was there, the more I got used to it. It was nice to have someone to talk to. Everything was fine in the beginning, she touched my arm or shoulder or on my knees as we sat, talked and spent time together. It had been pleasant. Nobody had touched me since I lived with the Borg, except mother with her cold slippery hands or the Borg drones when they brought me into my room to lock me up. I started to enjoy it, these little touches every now and then. But at some point it was not more pleasant and I ... I ... did not understand. I did not know what Amira wanted me to do. She touched me everywhere and I felt strange. I did not want it, I asked her to stop it and she did it. She pretended that these incidents had never happened. But they passed on and Amira became more intrusive and at some point she blackmailed me with her knowledge, about my secrets so she could do things to me she wanted to do. I let it happen just so she did not confide my secrets to mom and I was not punished. But I felt terrible. I felt dirty and every touch just hurt. I did not know what to do, how to protect myself from it. So I went to mother when it became too unbearable for me and confessed to her that Amira did things to me that bothered me and made it impossible for me to work effectively and poison my mind. Mother was so angry with Amira and she punishing her, but she should stay with me to watch over me and spy for my mother. But she did not touch me anymore. Well, not as it used to be, just occasionally here and there, "Nika said softly and shamefully. "Since then I've hated and loathed every touch because they remind me what Amira did to me."

Kathryn listened in the meantime speechless and stunned, tears ran down her cheeks, which she angrily wiped away.

"Oh Nika, I'm so sorry that happened to you. I ... I feel so guilty that it all happened. I can understand why you do not want to be touched anymore and apologize for touching you now and then. I did not mean to hurt you." Kathryn gushed out as Nika stood quietly in the corner for a long moment and did not continue to talk.

"Is it safe that Amira is dead?" Nika asked instead, as she turned back to Kathryn.

Kathryn could see a few tears on Nikas cheeks.

"Yes, the search party has not found anything from her. The explosion seems to have destroyed everything of her and the bear." Kathryn replied gravely.

"Good." Nika said, staring at the floor. "What now?" She asked softly.

"I made arrangements for my departure to the A Zone. I ... I do not want to hurt you any more than I already did by imposing my company on you and interfering in your life. However, I want you to know that you are always welcome with me and you can always come visit me if you wish. I may also come by every now and then and see how you are, but I will not force you to be someone you are not. Okay?" Kathryn asked softly.

Nika looked at Kathryn and Kathryn's was astonished, at she did not look at Nikas eyes pleased, but more than sad.

"What is it?" Kathryn asked worriedly and took a step closer to Nika and wanted to stroke her cheek. But before she did, she remembered that it might be uncomfortable for Nika, so she lowered her hand in time and left her hanging by her side.

Nika took a step closer to Kathryn, tears streaming from her eyes and rolling down her cheeks. Carefully, she took Kathryn's hand in her hand and brought it to her cheek and put it on it.

Kathryn looked at her confused at first, but then she smiled gently at Nika and stroked her cheek.

"Please do not leave me alone." Nika asked quietly and Kathryn was speechless.

"What?" She asked in surprise as she took her hand from Nika's cheek and sat back on the bed.

Nika sat down next to her and, to Kathryn's astonishment, put her hand in her hand and watched her for a while. Kathryn already knew this behavior, Nika looked at her little insects just as intensively as she looked at her hand and held it lightly.

"When I returned to the cave and was completely alone, I felt very bad and it hurt physically. I felt lonely and completely lost. The whole life had no meaning and I did not know what I wanted to do anymore. I did not want to live anymore, I wanted this to stop and I could finally find peace and quiet. But then you came back, you found me in the dark and held me in your arms as I was slowly dying. I felt bad, but you were with me and I finally felt peace and quiet in me. The prospect of being alone and lonely again scares me and makes me feel bad. I do not want to feel that way anymore. Please stay with me." Nika pleaded desperately and lowered her head.

Kathryn, without thinking, pulled Nika into her arms and held her gently. Nika immediately threw her arms around Kathryn and slumped against her, her tears streaming down her face, and she sniffed quietly as Kathryn gently stroked her hair.

"Shht, everything is fine. I stay with you and do not leave you alone anymore. I will be there for you, but only as long as you wish. But we spend the winter in the A Zone, okay?" Kathryn asked, hoping that Nika would agree.

Nika nodded her head and Kathryn let out a sigh of relief. "Yes."


	21. Chapter 21

**5 years later**

Personal logbook Kathryn Janeway:

When we arrived in the A Zone five years ago, we decided to build a house outside the zone in a forest and meadow area. Our house is about half an hour walk from the nearest town.

So I was able to go to the city every day and do my work as a teacher, while Nika stayed at home, farmed the farm, with the various vegetables and fruits she grew, and kept and fed more and more animals. Nika had a knack for animals and for children.

Nika also regularly visited the school I worked in and introduced the children to their animals and explained to them everything there was to know about the particular animal or insect.

Nika, but also me, regularly took the appointments of a conselor. So I was better able to handle my feelings of guilt and process Nika, her life with the Borg.

But during all this time, there were many tears, misunderstandings, quarrels and even doubts in which Nika often fled instead of talking to me. But over time we learned, especially Nika to handle better with all the feelings, guilt and trauma and it became easier.

We agreed from the start that Nika did not need another mom. She wanted me to have as a friend. And I realized more and more that my growing feelings for Nika were more than maternal in nature. I let Nika set the pace of how our relationship developed.

In the beginning, Nika wanted my closeness and my consolation, but as soon as I came too close, she could not handle it and stiffened or fled. It took a lot of time, patience, and empathy from my side to make Nika feel that everything was okay the way it was. And that she had time and always could say and decide what she wanted and what she did not want.

I was often more than desperate, but the discussions with the Conselor and the support of my friends helped me a lot to overcome and survive hard times with Nika.

And it was worth it. Nika thawed more and more and gradually allowed more closeness. Especially when she was with her animals or had to do with children, she was more relaxed and happy. After such days, she was much more carefree and also emotional. And in the evening, when I lay in my bed, Nika came and crawled under the covers and we cuddled together.

It took many months before we shared the first affectionate kiss, holding each other and falling asleep together. And it took months before we started to touch each other gently and tenderly the first time.

It took more than 3 years until Nika finally felt completely comfortable with my touch and could give back caresses and our common living together harmonious, informal and we were happy together.

And today is finally the big day we have been looking forward to for months. I'm so looking forward to finally meeting my Nika in front of the wedding altar and to be able to lead her home as my wife.

Logbook entry end.

*********************

Kathryn and Nika were happy to be in their beds after the wedding party attended by all their friends and smiled widely as Nika leaned over to Kathryn and kissed her gently.

"I love you." she whispered softly and Kathryn's heart melted away. Lovingly she took Nika in her arms and pulled her close.

"I love you sweetheart." Kathryn said and smiled tenderly at her Nika.

The End


End file.
